JRR Jokien (joshcarlosjosh)

@www.jrrjokien.com

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Jokien About Tolkien, faith, pop culture, and more!

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“I wish it need not have happened in my time,” said Frodo. “lmao" said Gandalf, “well it has.”

BREAKING: in a 9-0 decision, the black-robed Supreme Injustices of Mordor have ruled that the Dark Lord has immunity for official acts undertaken while wielding the One ring to rule them all.

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JRR Jokien (joshcarlosjosh)

✨⚜️ NEW SHORT STORY ⚜️✨ 🐉 a dragon (with a princess) 🗡️ a knight (with a plan) 🏰 a palace (with a bad king) 👥 second pov ❣️only 99c 🔖 book link: mybook.to/eJsBfU 📚 goodreads: www.goodreads.com/book/show/21...

BILBO: Happy Friday! GANDALF: What do you mean? Do you wish me a happy Friday, or mean that it is a happy Friday whether I want it or not; or that you feel happy this Friday; or that it is a Friday to be happy on? BILBO: All of them at once, I suppose.

logging into a social media app after being gone for months:

me to all the books on my many bookshelves:

[youth pastor voice] you know who else was briefly down?

🎶 CERVEZA CRISTAL! 🎶

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JRR Jokien (joshcarlosjosh)

me: look for my coming at first light of the fifth day my date: ok can you be more specific are you thinking about coffee or-- me: at dawn, look to the east

dune 2? yeah I'm into dune 2: dune 2 others as you would have them dune 2 you

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JRR Jokien (joshcarlosjosh)

THEY’RE TAKING THE HOBBITS TO ISENGARD 💘 (thank u @www.jrrjokien.com forever for this)

THE BEACONS ARE LIT! GONDOR CALLS FOR AID!!

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JRR Jokien (joshcarlosjosh)

reconnecting with mutuals from the blue bird site:

Bluesky invites are now worth a little less than Kohl's cash but a little more than NFTs

wow, unfollowing now, loved his gifts of knowledge and rings to the peoples of middle-earth, was unaware he forged in secret a master Ring, to control all others

Dispensing with the requirement for invites, Bluesky now only asks you to "speak friend and enter" to sign up

these days you can't even make one ring to rule them all anymore, because of woke

me (secretly a dragon): would you still love me if I was a wyrm?

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JRR Jokien (joshcarlosjosh)

Guess who just got back today That old gray wizard who had gone away These days he’s more white than gray But man I still think that wizard’s great They were asking if he was around Where he was how he could be found Don’t you know he was living down south Driving all the old ents crazy

Toyotathon was originally a pagan holiday before Big Auto changed the date of the Sale-bration to December to increase profits

"You know what the dwarves awoke in the darkness of Khazad-dum... antlers and flame"

Drums… drums… in the deep Pa rum pum pum pum A shadow moves in the dark Pa rum pum pum pum We cannot get out Pa rum pum pum pun They are coming Pa rum pum pum pum, Rum pum pum pum, Rum pum pum pum

You know Dasher and Dancer And Prancer and Vixen Comet and Cupid And Donner and Blitzen But they were all of them deceived for another reindeer was made

[youth pastor voice] are you in the top 1% of listeners to the Word of God?

everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. strike swiftly and decisively while they are distracted by this other battle

🎵 Last Christmas I gave you my heart... 🎵 ARAGORN: and my sword LEGOLAS: and my bow GIMLI: and my AXE!

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JRR Jokien (joshcarlosjosh)

Reply to

JRR Jokien (joshcarlosjosh)

I feel you. I tried to very gently make my aunt a little more aware of what's going on in the world so that she doesn't fall for these crazy social media conspiracy theories, and suddenly my uncle is all up in my face like "Láthspell I name you, Ill-news; and ill news is an ill guest they say."

me: *walking up the driveway to my parents' house yesterday* no politics this year, josh also me after one (1) beer: WHERE WAS GONDOR WHEN THE WESTFOLD FELL??