people need to stop being such assholes about age gaps between adults
it infantilizes the younger party to claim that they don't have agency when an older party is involved, and simultaneously accuses the older party of being a child predator even though no child is involved
as someone who had been on the younger end of a 12 year age gap relationship consensually off and on for like 5 years starting at 21, the prevailing attitude that older adults cannot and should not treat younger adults as anything but children really pisses me off
the healthiest relationships i've been in were the ones where i was on the younger end of a modest to sizeable age gap, and whenever i see people getting upset about measly 3 year gaps and the like i feel so alienated
people are so worried about coming off as a bad person they get neurotic about anything that could imply some kind of danger, without any consideration for context. I can say "I graduated high school while my girlfriend was in middle school" and it's a true fact but we met when she was 25!!!!
i think power gaps are much more significant in adults than age gaps tbh. like if I'm 30 and my boss is 60, really isn't much different in my head than if I'm 20 and my boss is 60. he's still my boss
age really only matters as far as power goes at young ages. 8 year olds can easily bully 6 year olds. a 17 year old shouldn't be dating a 12 year old. but it's all levels of power in the end, and all that age guarantees after you reach adulthood is experience
It's so true! It can also effect the relationship because of it. I had this 18 year old flirting with me and the feelings were mutual but I had believed propaganda that any adult flirting with an 18 year old must be a creep. They had to tell me "stop babying me"
i remember a while ago there was a big uproar over like a 60 year old getting with a like 27 year old
like both parties are over 25 who gives any fucks, if anything I'd be concerned about the ~60 year old guy
i literally worked with a couple that was like a 22 year old guy and a 60 year old woman and my reaction was basically just like "go for it man if you both love each other"
I feel like where you’re at in life matters a lot more than age per se. The two can be directly connected, and the disconnect can be rough, speaking from personal experience. But what most people are doing when they fret about this is conflating that with power, which as noted is a different thing.
