Mitch

@mitchsn.bsky.social

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between therapists at the moment

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the leftism leaving your body when you see a kid wearing a tail at the july 4th parade

got told I have stand-up comedian energy at a house party today but she clarified it was actually a compliment so I’m feeling good 😎

“I don’t get your posts.” the layman may hate the poet for creating that which the commoner can’t appreciate - and yet what is more godly than this act of sharing what is oft misunderstood? the poster’s mind works in ways incomprehensible

a polycule-themed toy named Poly Pocket would be not dissimilar to the real Polly Pocket since they both wear little rubber clothes

if I slept like this my back would spasm to pieces. that’s why I need a cat spine replacement for my flimsy human spine

call me dr. dog the way I’m asking where’d all the time go?

me: she Church on my Hill til I Winst museum docent: sir this is the smithsonian

who’s centering their kennedy rn

when jason derulo says “our conversations ain’t long” in talk dirty to me, nothing could be more unrelatable to me and my partner. our conversations will outlive the human race. we have yapped since the dawn of time and will yap for eternity still.

oh, you have one of those mainstream genders? that’s fine I guess, it’s just that mine’s homemade…

who’s up simming themselves* right now? *playing the sims 4 with a sim version of yourself

just thought of the planter’s peanutmobile when I meant to think of the oscar meyer weinermobile. don’t text

trucker tiktok hit: 🎵 CDL Drizzy

founding an opposing magazine called the pacific that has actually good takes in protest

just saw an instagram post of lake como vacation pics captioned “comosexual 🏳️‍🌈” visibility matters. allyship matters.

let people hate things. let people enjoy things. duality is possible and not contradictory when I do it

cradling his primordial pouch (he’s a cat)

the most authentic mexican food is likely not found in the frozen aisle at trader joe’s, but someone still needs to make sure and it might as well be me

keeping a notebook with me at all times to write down post ideas when inspiration strikes. this is why notebooks were invented

the amazon delivery drivers are at hand. my time has come. I fear I don’t have much time-

manager who has been informed “guys” is not inclusive: hey, good to be back in the office with you males!

I celebrated my quarter-life crisis at 26 instead of 25 to project an optimism that I’ll live past 100

and me? I’m a Vlasic man myself. something to take the edge off

those bastards, they did it. they did the flintstones thing irl

there needs to be some sort of captcha system for this so google knows it’s ok when I use this meme

tired: let’s have a kiki 🗣️ wired: let’s have a bouba 🧋

lizzo’s playboy brother rizzo

I have two cats because god gave me two hands to pet with. if I grew a third hand in a freak accident, I would have no choice but to adopt a third cat 😌

statistically, the first child conceived through bluesky dms is already old enough to be shitposting with the rest of us

pronouncing sativa like saliva