Brian

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Brian

@one-underscore.bsky.social

You can dial 206-526-6087 for weather, or 511 for traffic.
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i've got a hot date coming up
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I am thrilled to share with my Linkedin family that I have accepted a position as a Johnny Mnemonic brain-implant data smuggler! 🧠💾😤
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sorry, i only eat chef-inspired cuisine
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play white noise to drown out fireworks noise
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studio albums from the 60s that are in stereo? borderline unlistenable. live albums from the 60s that are in stereo? fantastic.
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saw a van with a sign that said "it pays to play pull tabs" and while that is obviously not true, it really made me think about how completely benign 25 cent pull tabs are compared to the plague of sports gambling.
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give a man a carrot, and he'll have a healthy snack. give a man a stick, and he'll have a stick for a lifetime.
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all these people are out here saying "you should rotate your mattress" well i did it and i hurt my elbow, so i say you shouldn't rotate it.
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i've been cutting my hair using a beard trimmer (and some chip clips to get the length) for the past few years, but i recently got a regular hair clipper a while back and i'm happy with the purchase. the wider sweep and stronger motor means it faster and i wind up with fewer missed spots.
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will they be keeping the heroin subplot in the remake of "three men and a baby"? you'll have to watch to find out!
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my first apartment, there was a vacant ground level retail spot in the building. one day i saw some people building it out, and when i saw the manager, i asked what was going in and they said "a bail bondsman is moving in"
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in "chocolat 2", juliette binoche's character turns her chocolate shop into a vape shop.
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saw a teriyaki shop that opened a few years ago with an "urban/upscale" branding (kind of unusual for a teriyaki shop) but has now rebranded to more "fast/cheap". kind of feels like the doors are closing on premiumization of everything, and thank god for that.
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the most useless thing i can remember is that my high school's asb co-president saw george wendt in a west end production of "art" when he visited his studying-abroad brother in london.
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presidential fitness test version of "full metal jacket". "born to do a pull up" written in sharpie on an underdeveloped bicep.
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we must keep our wits about us.
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nowadays kids would rather play with a computer instead of a corn husk doll
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i wish there was an insurrection episode of mtv true life.
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i'm getting some strange readings
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after you leave college, if your roommate dies, instead of automatically getting straight As, you just don't have to pay taxes.
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i bet every guy that fixes wooden horse drawn carts calls himself "dr. dray"
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internet souvenir shop. remember your trip to the internet with a t-shirt or keychain.
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psychological horror film idea: a little free library that is always full of walter isaacson books.
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in the 1st of its 2 seasons, the senior association had the suns, sun sox, and super sox.
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the mlb draft is coming up. make sure that if someone writes a "draft grades" story, you respond to them with "D-, very poor, even for you"
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we won't be back on the right track until pizza places start selling big cheap buckets of spaghetti again
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when i hear people talking about internships, i think about this intern who was asked to assemble a routine catering order for a meeting, and only ordered 20 mushroom sandwiches, since that was the only vegan option on the menu. it was unintentionally the best prank i've ever seen at an office.
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the skateboard remake of "how green was my valley" will be called "how gleam was my cube"