Jessica Ellis

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Jessica Ellis

@baddestmamajama.bsky.social

Filmmaker (WHAT LIES WEST) and flirt. People liked me a lot on Twitter.
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Faerie Tale Theater was amazing but can we all agree the part of the trailer for it with the stuff from The Nightengale is the most terrifying thing that’s ever happened?
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With nut, sunflower, rosemary, avocado, and banana allergies and now lactose intolerance and an inability to swallow most raw veggies I feel like I’ve just…quit lunch? There’s only so much tahini and tofu a girl can handle in a day. Can someone just make me a Vegas-sized pina colada for lunch now?
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I’ve only ever smoked a handful of times, but my mother would chain smoke when she was stressed, and so now, anytime the world seems truly dire, I crave cigarettes. Second hand emotional addiction???
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I am not a political strategist but if by a series of wacky coincidences I had to decide democratic campaign strategy my plan would be that B should resign right now, Harris should come into the election as an incumbent. Huge media focus on her as the first female president.
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Cannot stress to you enough that you should mix some lemonade and a can of reed’s ginger ale with however much white rum god permits you and put it in popsicle molds
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It’s so important to me that baby jalapeños look like tiny hulk dicks.
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Has anyone ever studied whether you can cure long Covid by eating a lot of sourdough bread? Because if not I’m prepared to be the Grigor Mendel of this method.
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I said to Sean today “this place seems pretty protected from crowds” And he thought I said “from dragons” But here is the thing. He replied “that’s true.”
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One of my fav podcast hosts recently said “back during the pandemic…well, wait, I guess that’s not the right way to say it.” And I honestly welled up. Maybe a tide is starting to turn.
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The plums are good this year, don’t tell a lot of people, though. They don’t deserve them.
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Having to take a lot of days off work for despair lately.
Reposted byAvatar Jessica Ellis
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had a dream mcdonald’s had a new size of french fries called “just fuck me up” where they just handed you a paper bag full of fries
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I am six hours into temporarily cutting out dairy to see if I’m lactose intolerant and already I want to quit.
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I think I’ve figured out that the way I feel about speculating if there’s an afterlife is also the way I feel about people with absolutely zero knowledge or forethought saying “I could write a movie, it’s easy.”
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Look I don’t want the power or prestige of being rich I just want to have a koi pond.
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Every interaction I ever had with Scott on twitter over the years was him being insanely funny, and I’ll be damned if I let him stop because he’s dead. All my love to all who were close to him.
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I am so lonely I’m trying to befriend a crow, which given Avian Flu could end up being a cleopatra/asp situation.
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I am getting a little tired of the sanctimoniousness of being told I MUST go to movie theaters but if I ask for accommodations to be able to do that (ie, some masked screenings) I am told absolutely not. You can’t both exclude people from safely attending and complain that they aren’t showing up.
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Oh I have a headache from looking at my work screen! Shall I take a break by looking at the screen where I read books? Or the screen where I do art? Or the screen where I play games? Or the screen where I talk to friends?
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In a long Covid crash and made it from the bed to the couch at 3:30 pm, please clap
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I’m seeing a trend among some Covid cautious people to tell angry anti-maskers that we didn’t force the mask mandates, and while we didn’t, I don’t get that strategy. It was right that there were mask mandates. People should still be wearing masks. You *are* very much “grandma killers.”
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Why do recipes measure bread in cups? What the fuck planet do they come from??
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I’ve been around slightly more people than usual this week on vacation, and man. People have truly become completely uncivilized in public.
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I’m lucky to get to take a vacation, but I underestimated how frustrating having long Covid is on a vacation. There’s so much to do and enjoy and try out, and I have about a mile, total, of steps in me per day before I’m completely exhausted. I keep losing things I didn’t think about til they happen
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“But doctor, I am Pagliacci.” *pulling out Manila envelope* “And I am a process server, you’ve been served.”
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I’ve definitely hit That Age Where I Get Joni Mitchell
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War horse baby. War horse baby. Clip clip cloppity cloo.
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Never in my life thought I’d see them. Even if mostly through a camera.
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The churro scene in CHALLENGERS is sexier than the entirety of Call Me By Your Name. When Patrick pulls the stool closer? Lord.
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I am officially threw-my-back-out-by-walking-across-the-room years old.