Absolute Angel

@buttsommelier.bsky.social

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Everyone is saying too much

wrain borm

Seriously how are you gonna do him like that 🫢

Lmao roasted 😭😭😭😭😭

It's a crime that there's a cat with heart eyes emoji and no dog with heart eyes emoji

Everyone dunking on the "ADHD people don't miss people" take when it's just a clumsily-expressed description of a common experience

Daily reminder that if you're going to make a post beginning with "daily reminder," you can remove that part to make the post at least 10% better. As you can see, this post only reaches the 90th percentile of posting excellence, but I'm willing to sacrifice a perfect post to make a perfect point

Love 2 shower and have diarrhoea right after

I never want to find out what she could say about me but I wanna know what she'd say about me. Could probably get me to end it all in three words

Azealia Banks on Elon lol

respect to the dermatologist selling this guy Retin A for $2 million a year

just realized i predicted this guy 8 years ago

Help me out with something: what are words relevant to both sexuality and technology?

there's no wrong side of a guillotine as long as you're not on both sides

"Oh but the numbers went up. the graph says things are good, actually" fucking SHUT UP unless you want to be on the wrong side of the guillotine

The dog managed to catch and kill a squirrel during our walk so there's another drop in the ocean of absolutely fucked vibes

I still haven't gotten to have gay sex in Baldurs Gate 3 except for the male drow but that was in the dark and he dumped spiders on me. WHY WON'T YOU BANG ME GALE???

I'm publicly posting my codes suck it nerds

found the onlyfans of a guy performing under the name PrePa Pig, which is kinda funny, but not the least bit sexy

Frequently I'll write a post, read it back, and even if it's fine, discard it. More people should try this

Deeply disturbing how many people are failing the easiest moral test of all time

that's enough bg3 spoilers for today thank you bsky

This nice lady did a very funny joke and everyone got mad

Or men could get therapy and heal.

Just described a couple I met as "the guy and the wife" but in my defense I had them mixed up

Who's got the uncensored Frank Biden dick pic? I need it for masturbating

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Absolute Angel

Happy Columbo’s Day

movie review time Totally Killer: didn't do enough with the premise Talk To Me: did a lot with a straightforward, well-trod premise

It's so funny I was talking to my mom the other night and she said she didn't see how anyone could support Israel after everything they've done to the Palestinians. Then we started talking about China and oh boy does she have some opinions on the sinister Chinese government lol

they're really going to wipe the Palestinians out and say they deserved it aren't they

what liberalism does to a mf

A lot of people are saying this season of American Horror Story is DOA, but let's talk about the parts that are working:

Time to check out the butts!