clayton

@claytonjames.bsky.social

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Inventor of Capn Crunch: Oops! All Berries

Voted most likely to invent Capn Crunch: Oops! All Berries in highschool

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If my main political enemy had called me Sleepy Joe for years, I would simply not say that I’m too sleepy to be president. But that’s just me

Fuck it Joe Biden should rob a liquor store

I’m no expert on bias, but seems weird that 3 of the Justices who ruled in Trumps favor were APPOINTED BY HIM. They were like “I find the guy who gave me tons of power and prestige, not guilty”

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clayton

Millie and Piano Man can’t even make it through a whole movie

Jaws (1975)

Johnny did not have to go so hard when he played the fiddle against the devil [remembers literally anything about the story] oh wait he totally did

His body is shaped like he’s trying to sneak candy into the movie theater

[solemnly] One must wonder how many rocky horrors man can fit into a single picture show

It kept hallucinating extra chicken fingers

You and me both, dog treats

Roku is different up here in Canada

This is what the average Bluesky user wants

#webcomic

Shout out to the guy on my flight today whose only carry on item was a ziplock bag of pills

Sorry but stuffed animals are already queer coded. “I cuddle with a big bear to feel safe at night” Major twink energy

The past few days have basically been a taste of heaven for the people who liked this tweet

POV you have a cookie and Piano Man wants a bite

D List Batman villains are like you’ll never stop me, I am…

POV it’s 2024 and you just got an exorcism

I wanna use these tools but every time I look at them I just see my parents fighting

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clayton

When I'm outside and smell weed

Designing tee shirts is my passion

We got a puppy. His name is Piano Man

No. 1 - Working Knowledge Of Age Of Consent Laws

6’3?!? He could’ve been the other kind of Trail Blazer