Juli Smae

@julisneider.bsky.social

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Who tf is Juli?

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“If you don’t like bumps, you shouldn’t go down rocky roads.” - child of @milesgrant.bsky.social

It’s Juneteenth. I *would* say I’m glad that humans don’t think of other humans as property anymore but sadly, ending slavery didn’t end the potential for assholery. Check your bias, check your behavior, and ask yourself if you’re using the language of oppression. We need to do better.

Sending hugs and good vibes to those of us for whom Father’s Day is complicated; trauma llamas, people grieving, adoptees, donor conceived baddies, NPE folx, and other DNA surprise pals. And I want to wish a Happy “I see you” to stepdads, pet dads, trans ppl, fun uncles, etc.

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Adults with lesbian parents “generally felt positive about their donor conception, realizing that it enabled them to be born into a loving family that very much wanted them,” according to recent findings from the longest-running study of lesbian families. mombian.com/2024/05/28/a...

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my little thing about sperm banks is that anonymous donor conception is a horrendous ethical disaster (not to say crime) and should have been outlawed yesterday ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Of all the fish to choose from, who decided the mackerel was holy?

Sadly, I’m not glamping in a yurt.

Sadly not… I’m glamping in a yurt

Imagine you’re a star and someone walks up to you like “Twinkle Twinkle, little star.” I’d be offended tbh.

Um I’d like the internet to know that not only did I mow the lawn, I did so with a push style reel mower. Zero-emission lawn care for the win!

My partner @julisneider.bsky.social mowed the lawn while I took a nap, and I felt a little guilty after So, in a really thoughtful & egalitarian move, the dishwasher immediately died & barfed all over the floor

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Goes beyond deodorant too. Why is dishwashing soap artificially scented? I don't need my coffee mug smelling like fake lemon. Why is laundry detergent scented? Why can't we just clean things without drowning them in chemical fragrances? (My partner @julisneider.bsky.social has chemical sensitivity.)

No I will NOT put deodorant on my ballbag, thank you very much. defector.com/suddenly-eve...

Suddenly Every Deodorant Company Wants To Get In My Pants | Defectordefector.com I was listening to a podcast the other day, because I’m a bored white man. This was a football podcast, but the lead-in to this episode featured two women gabbing intensely about how Secret deodorant ...

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The directions are always like, before assembly, just spread all 25 pieces out on the floor. “We bought a cheap desk we have to assemble ourselves on Wayfair, clearly we don’t have tons of space!!” - @julisneider.bsky.social

What’s the right tip for the pizza driver tho?

Shopping for women’s clothing is such a trip. Like where are your pants? If you’re wearing a swimsuit why do you need a jacket? Who stands or kneels like that?? #ihavequestions #patriarchy #makeitmakesense

Apparently this coffee will solve all the problems that my cats cannot. i.refs.cc/bh0HgNXw?smi...

As a bisexual, any time I walk into a medical facility, I should get an automatic IV drip because I am dehydrated.

IG but it’s JUST cute baby animals. Like not the rest of insta just cute. Baby. Animals.

Hear me out: Jesus Christ Superstar but Mary Magdalene is non-binary.

I called to order pizza. Like used my voice to speak to a human. They said it’d be delivered in a half hour. It got here in 10 mins. Sometimes Gen X hacks work.

People with chemical sensitivity have been gaslit by doctors, invalidated by "loved ones" and refused accommodations by employers. It's no wonder we've been silenced. We're sick and no one is helping. I'm done with this stupid society.

Stop me if you heard this before, actually don't because once I start telling the story I need to finish it. #ADHD

“There is no reason anyone should have to take a cab to the grocery store.” - @milesgrant.bsky.social

Moral Redemption at the Roulette Table was the original name of Panic! At the Disco.

😎

🖕🇺🇸 I had 4 scrips today and how many could I get filled? Z E R O #americanhealthcaresucks

In The Princess Bride Buttercup is sure that her man’s will show up for her. This is the only example I’ve ever seen of a human being with secure attachment.

DoorDash, just lie to me. Overestimate the time. So if you’re early, I’ll be pleasantly surprised. 😁

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Weird how doing absolutely nothing to incentivize people to drive less has failed to get people to drive less @streetsblogusa.bsky.social

Massachusetts Drivers Burned More Gasoline in 2023, Undermining Governor Healey's Climate Goals - St...mass.streetsblog.org In a frustrating setback to the Commonwealth’s climate goals, Massachusetts drivers incinerated 24 million more gallons of gasoline in 2023 than they did in 2022, according to state tax collection d...

I have to be somewhere by 10am. It will take me 7 mins to drive there. I am telling myself I need to leave at 9:45 but I know I’m lying to myself. So maybe I’ll tell myself I need to leave at 9:30am to pad the time for my time padding. #HEYDHD

“Pep talk” and “pet talk” sound similar. Coincidence? I think not.

A: I can’t tell if your beef is with Jesus or Santa. Me: Both.