the Supreme Court’s jurisprudence on corruption is basically at a point where the only thing that counts as a bribe is someone handing a public official a giant bag of money with a dollar sign on it while saying “this is a bribe” out loud
Peter, I'm afraid you're missing a couple of key components of the test. The briber has to say something like:
"Here is a bag of money IN ADVANCE in payment for this exact thing I would like you to do in your capacity as a public official, and I am saying this for the public record."
And then of course the bribed has to say "I am taking these actions on account of this bag of money as agreed, instead of as an unrelated coincidence."
