D.N. Schmidt, Space Opera Author 🛸: The worst part of Dungeons & Dragons is when your character dies and the DM gets to eat all your dice. You’re crying and she’s just like cromch cromch cromch. ☹️

The worst part of Dungeons & Dragons is when your character dies and the DM gets to eat all your dice. You’re crying and she’s just like cromch cromch cromch. ☹️

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Black Leaf failed to find the poison trap and I declare her dead cromch cromch cromch

*cracks up*

Glad I could return the favor! I was dying.

this is why i use metal dice, to discourage killer DMs

Beware a slightly iron deficient DM who hasn't taken her supplements that day 🎲

I hate this OSR nonsense. A modern DM would let the player have half (rounding down).

I prefer games where all dice eating is player facing

DM has always meant “Dice Muncher”

That's fantastic! 😄

Your DM is chill. Mine starts every session by putting a gun on the table and saying "You die in the game, you die for real." It's been 3 years and my character mainly farms, runs away from kobolds, is still level 1. I ain't dying in no dungeon.

That’s not a DM, it’s a goat. Easy mixup though.

It's hard work to kill a character! We deserve a little snack afterwards.

And THIS is why I use metal dice. If I have to suffer the bitter defeat of my beloved character, the DM will have to suffer the loss of their teeth as they attempt to crunch my dice.

I always craft a character's set of dice from the fragments of the previous DM's teeth

That's why you need to make sure to buy high fibre dice. I mean you gotta have some empathy for your DM who worked so hard to make your finely min-maxed character, right?

... make it die. I can't even shitpost correctly. Call me old. :)

No worries. I figured that was what you meant. 😁

It's when they light their cigar with my rolled up character sheet that it really starts to hurt.

I manage to never face that situation be having no friends, therefore never play and I can just gather all my dice together and hug them.. Lonelier, undoubtedly, but my dice friends are always with me.

OMG, now I'm thinking about a game played with candy dice

Even worse when you are playing a virtual game and your whole computer gets nommed!

The secret is to use volleyball sized foam dice. No cromching on those.

i got metal dice for just such an occasion.

justifiable homicide.

We use a VTT, and I keep having to buy new monitors.

Thats why I am playing online

Nah, that's the best part.

@tcpatrick.bsky.social Is this true?

It’s one of the byelaws. It sometimes gets awkward with the tears, but rules are rules. It’s also the main reason DMs put on weight during tough campaigns.

Sounds legit, no further questions 😁👍

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