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Need to become the kind of person who says "what" as a relative pronoun in nonstandard places, like "I went to that coffee shop what sells the good cookies."
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We should all be readopting as many grammatical and dialect quirks as possible to hinder the further spread of the English language as the default language of the world. English accelerationism, innit.
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I have been using what in this manner and the word innit for years and all it's ever gotten me is trash being pelted at me
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Man what gets trash pelted at him.
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i'm here to find the gator what stole my leg
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This happens automatically if you extensively expose yourself to 2nd-string British punk bands in your teens, me China.
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what is rule number 3 mi compa?
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we are a people what can change our reality any time us want. LET'S FUCKEN GOOOOO AMIGOS