Crime Sprees

@crimesprees.bsky.social

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Born and raised hardcore creationist fundamentalist. Current conspiracy researcher, cybersecurity specialist, and extremely online person trying to atone by using my powers for good and helping people understand my community of origin.

Champion shitposter

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I monitor some FB profiles and groups for keeping tabs on modern fundamentalist conspiracy stuff. The mid-sized public Christian Facebook groups are ripe with content. I bring to the skyline some fruits of my labors.

If I had a nickel for every time a politician this election cycle got negative press for their campaign because of a story where they're super proud of a dead dog, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot but it's weird that it's happened twice.

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ᔕᕼᑌT ᑌᑭ, ᕼOᖇSƬ

I know can you believe the WOKE LEFT had the balls to release this movie?

I get to hunt and kill one (1) hobbit

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Crime Sprees

He's a assembled a real who's-who laundry list of losers in a Twitter spaces where he's drunkenly rambling about demons coming for him. Maybe an overstatement but I hope everyone in this screenshot dies.

Stay in your lane

Reply to

Boring Weirdo

Brilliant

Newsmax really hitting the journalism hard this month. Apparently they've got new evidence Jesus raised from the dead! What a hot story! I bet everyone in the major journalism outlets on the resurrection beat are pretty jealous they weren't first to publish!

One of the true joys of being a researcher/documenter of conspiracy communities is that every once in a while one of the nitwits addled with brain worms churning out low quality memes accidentally produces a meme that absolutely slaps for entirely different reasons than what they intended.

Every year when I fill out my NCAA bracket

This whole doctored photo story is more proof that being a royal would fucking suck. The dream they sell us when we're young of marrying a prince/princess is a lie. The Princess Diaries is propaganda. Anne Hathaway deserves to be in the Hague.

You guys I have great news

Hold up a sec I'm doing gematria on DIED ON TOILET and PEANUT BUTTER BACON

Project Veritas CEO Hannah Giles, June 8, 2023: More committed than ever! Honored to lead this amazing team! Project Veritas CEO Hannah Giles, December 11, 2023: I have contacted the authorities regarding this unsalvageable mess.

BREAKING: Project Veritas CEO Hannah Giles has resigned from the role after discovering "strong evidence of past illegality" at the organization, which she has "brought...to the appropriate law enforcement agencies." Giles took over as CEO from James O'Keefe, who founded Project Veritas in 2010.

"We've been watching you from across this expensive tourist trap recreation old timey saloon and we really dig your vibe. Can we buy you a drink?"

I have some advice for the actor who takes the job

I don't like Trump any more than the rest of you but you have to admit he has assembled a crack legal team.

Here is a closer look at the scene inside the courtroom just before Donald Trump took the stand in his civil fraud trial on Monday. Follow live updates from our reporters. nyti.ms/3SwCHzI

Speaker of the House Mike Johnson is a Young Earth Creationist and written for YEC outlet Answers in Genesis, represented them in lawsuits, and advocated/defended tax breaks for AiG's "Ark Encounter" theme park in Kentucky. Ken Ham called him one of the only “godly men” in Washington, D.C.

Vivek calls his podcast "The Truth Podcast".

If you were wondering what specific kind of shameless opportunistic narcissist billionaire GOP candidate Vivek Ramaswamy is, on his podcast that he released today (exclusively on X!), he has noted "Most Cancelled Man Alive" Alex Jones on for a full hour to discuss the New World Order.

It is objectively funny to examine the brainrot behind "REJECT MODERNITY / WE USED TO BE A REAL SOCIETY" fascism resurgence and see that it leads to unironic posts like "We used to have fancy drain pipes! Now all drain pipes are fucking BULLSHIT!"

You weirdos and your weird shit is how I know Bluesky has the juice.

Ah yes, the Shaggy defense.

Reply to

Boring Weirdo

And who created this border crisis? You guessed it! Frank Stallone!

Today I learned there are cruise ships with bands on them and you take a cruise and the band you like plays shows on the cruise boat and I was like damn that's crazy so I googled more themed cruises and I learned that knitting cruises exist and they have promo materials like this:

If this doesn't make you want to pay money so you can get fucked up and knit with your friends on an ocean liner, then I don't know what will.

We used to have a society. We made art. Now look at us. We are so lost. BOTTOM TEXT

If anybody wants to use this quickly cobbled together ramshackle meme template I made from this morning's Mexican mummy alien hubbub.

Nuked and deleted my twitter. As a conspiracy researcher and internet rabbit hole aficionado, I have a pretty high tolerance for the kind of bile that is becoming ever more spewed there. But the recent BanTheADL trend this past weekend was a step too far. Use Redact to nuke your account and bail.