LC von Hessen 💀

@lcvonhessen.bsky.social

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Writer of horror, weird fiction, and assorted unpleasantness. Performer/artist/creep. History nerd. Cat person. They/them. 🔞
lcvonhessen[at]gmail[dot]com

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Looks like I'd be locked up for "Transmasc of the Red Death" alone 🙃

Psst: Project 2025 is terrifying for a lot of reasons but also because on page 5 it calls for teachers and librarians who grant access to books that are maligned as pornography (which just means anything LGBTQ) to be registered as sex offenders. Pass it on.

Monty is not sure what to think of my latest book preorder

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"bridal maggot"

The face of a man who is absolutely not impressed that his human just spent the last couple of days narrowing down cover art and checking the ARC proof for their upcoming book (which is dedicated to him even though he can't read)

Wanted something light after spending hours today working on book release stuff, so I started watching Bridgerton. It's very apparent that the appeal of this show is that it's basically fanfic about the entire Regency era. ("Is that good or bad?" Both?)

Real talk, I suspect the rally shooter will turn out to be a mentally unstable lone-wolf Hinckley type without leftist (and certainly not liberal LOL) politics--some weird conspiratorial third thing, most likely--no matter how Tr*mp's team tries to spin it

Spotted on my block today. Reject modernity (Christian nationalism); embrace tradition (the Great Old Ones)

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When ChatGPT was newish I experimented with it to see what it could do. Every 'story idea' it came up with was the most anodyne, dull, predictable thing ever. Every time I mentioned queer characters it always made the main conflict homophobia. All conflicts were resolved...

Hmmm

Data gets it

My contributor's copy of the latest Cosmic Horror Monthly (the Ligotti tribute issue) is here: my terrible son Pin Jr. can't wait to read it! Featuring my story "The Carnival is Dead and Gone" 🤡

There is now Paul Schrader Horror Discourse and I am so tired

It* begins *Cheap goth home furnishings season

BRB, going to go lie down in a peat bog and slowly transform into a mummy

Office party bog witch noir

"Hmm, better check the ol' Twitter this eveni--" *sees the topic of the day is Gen Z Sex Discourse [Again]*

"Patriotic slime"

Apparently it's "Nonbinary Awareness Week" so here is your reminder that it's perpetually gender roulette here at Casino von Hessen and the house always wins 🃏🎰

Just "love" how every legal argument in support of people who get fired for anti-trans shit boils down to "buh-buh-but it's my RIGHT to be an ASS HOLE 🥺"

I just cannot keep up with these newfangled beauty standards

I was introduced to this song during a burlesque number last Saturday and I must say I've rarely heard a song so perfectly engineered for men to bump dicks to at the dick-bumping bar youtu.be/GwAopnwwI9o?...

Bette Midler - My Knight In Black Leather - 12 Inch Disco Long Version 1979youtu.be German 12" Vinyl - Running Time 6:57 - 12 Inch Disco - Original Long Version from 1979, My first video here, sorry about the 'vinyl clicks'.

Coney Island has many sights for the connoisseur of weird ephemera and Uncanny Valley denizens. Here I paid my respects to the "Watch Her Dance to the End of Love" mannequin and the venerable Grandmother's Predictions fortune telling machine 💃🔮 (There's video on my Insta)

Coney Island at sunset.

Soon I, too, shall know The Secrets

I'm going to be on two panels for the third NecronomiCon in a row. There's one in particular that I'm especially excited about . . .

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Far-right chud in NYT: "They went about the ordinary business of life - laboring, raising children, worshipping their creator - untroubled by futile expectations of change." Medieval commoners: "I would rather the king and all kings were dead than that my son should be hurt on his little finger."

More anti-democratic thoughts from 2018 the NYT allowed this writer to exclude from his current piece. Delivered with an air of detached irony, as if he miiight be joking or exaggerating. But is he?

When some famous creative professional is outed as a sex pest, one of the most grating responses is "Well, *I've* always thought his work sucked, so no big loss." I've been seeing A LOT of that lately and it really is not helpful. The quality of the work is not the issue here, buddy

Vet Receptionist Cat is alternately sleeping on the job and having none of your people shit

Just ordered a ticket to see Hellraiser-themed burlesque in Coney Island tomorrow ⛓

Happy(?) 4th of July, fuckos! #itsguillotimebébé #teamtine2024

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LC von Hessen 💀