Good morning to everyone except Ian Smith, the pretentious twat. You've had one go, what the fuck are you going to do second time around you moron. Get in the sea.
Twin epi-pen pockets added to the back of my running vest for when I'm out with her Fairyness - made out of. £5 second hand wetsuit off eBay.
Only stabbed myself a few times as well, relatively minimal swearing. Result.
I’ve just popped to the pool bar and instead of asking for a 7-Up and a Pepsi Max, I asked the handsome young Spaniard for a ‘Sexy Max’ and now I have to simply dehydrate for the rest of the holiday. #mortified
This thirsty bitch. The Irish have a saying about someone like this: "At every wedding, he wants to be the bride; at every funeral, he wants to be the corpse."
Reminder:
If #England get beaten, so will she.
#DomesticViolence increases by 26% when #England win or draw and 38% if they lose.
If you are in immediate danger, call 999 and press 55 on the keypad.
Women- Refuge on 0808 2000 247
Men- Respect Men 0808 8010327
My master called, so fuck the people who were so desperate that they elected me to try and improve their lies because they are desperate for something, anything to believe in that they elected me. I have my career to think of.
Well that was fun. 5.5 hours drive including a stop for a RTC where I got to marshal and yell at fuckwits, then home to a whole bunch of wankers in the pub to watch the last bit of the final.
Fairy's tapped out, I have red wine.
It's been an odd weekend.
Cheers.
