Matt Provenzano

@mattprov.bsky.social

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greatest generation italians were 1000% right about one thing: restaurants are overrated and have a garden

seeing any german nationalism should make any decent person do the julia louis dreyfus nervous chuckle

the worst part about owning a house is the occasional Charlie Work of picking up a dead rat or bird

summer in staten island is great because there's just a mysterious explosion every night that you can hear from jersey to brooklyn

people are still chugging along here, huh? maybe i'll eventually drop the big T but I'd love to see more drama here

we need to go back to word-of-mouth zines and books, it's so over out here on the web

really glad silicon valley never messed up the milk or egg carton. some things really are eternal

I think tiktok is bad, it's definitely a problem for misinformation or whatever, but i'd still say that 80% of our information problems with respect to the voting public comes directly from cable news

MLB has announced that they will be reducing the pitch clock timer for runners on base from 20 seconds to √-1

big mistake by hamas to stock up on regular dates and not date butter, way more efficient nutrition that way

Really not a fun time to wake up and see headlines like "IDF raiding key hospital" knowing it's bankrolled by every paycheck i get

the most boomer possible angle that the problem wasn't the lack of accountability, but "f-bombs" lol

Michael Kay blasts Yankees GM Brian Cashman for profane rant: ‘He crossed lines.’

Michael Kay blasts Yankees GM Brian Cashman for profane rant: 'He crossed lines.'dlvr.it After Brian Cashman went on an uncharacteristically profane rant, Michael Kay was quick to remind everyone that’s not the Yankees way.

cool, np, then pay-no-mind forever. enjoy

Asked about the chances of a Gaza ceasefire, Biden said “None, no possibility" Via Bloomberg's Akayla Gardner

The Chicago White Sox have announced their promotional days for 2024: -We Hate Puppies Day -We Steal Candy From Your Baby Day -I'll Pickpocket You Sunday Half-Price Tickets Day

We really need the Milgram experiment for any journalist that has the desire to put the word "college" on A1 of a major newspaper

If it's the wrong judgment call to be too risk-averse in 2020, and there are "very real trade-offs and costs on either side," what would we call a status quo where the costs are testing, masks and ventilation, and instead we picked an extra ~3.75 million children becoming ill each year forever?

Not to casually enter a super polarizing and fraught issue but I think not going back into in person school in the fall of 2020 was at the time a defensible, prudent/cautious call but also I think the subsequent evidence shows that it was the wrong judgment call.

It's that time of year again: feeling cozy, falling asleep earlier, and wanting like, a solid month off from work to just loaf around and read books. it's not happening but i wish it every year

Wondering if I should vote for the Richmond County DA running unopposed, or the city councilman running unopposed, or the judge running unopposed. democracy is hard but it's good having options

I can’t stop thinking about this IDF testimony from Protective Edge. The image of that orange house just won’t leave my mind

Politicians lie about a lot of things, but the way they can go on television and just say "human shields" with absolutely no evidence or pushback is astonishing every time i hear it

It wasn't a good day for every Nate E in baseball

Royals Designate Nate Eaton For Assignment

Royals Designate Nate Eaton For Assignmentwww.mlbtraderumors.com The Royals announced that they have designated outfielder Nate Eaton for assignment. The club has been doing some roster maintenance

your haters will be fundraisers at the FBI raid of success

Breaking News: The FBI searched the home of Mayor Eric Adams’s fund-raising chief, Brianna Suggs, who is deeply entwined in efforts to advance the New York City mayor’s agenda.

F.B.I. Raids Home of Eric Adams’s Fund-Raising Chiefwww.nytimes.com The raid of the home of Brianna Suggs, a consultant with close ties to the mayor, came as Mr. Adams canceled a series of meetings in Washington, D.C., on Thursday.

Halloween is so dangerous because they're putting digital fentanyl into the snickers bars

It appears that Queers for Saudi World Cup 2034 are going to have some serious egg on their face

It’s how I sleep at night 👍

Slowly realizing that rooting for the Yankees is maybe one of the most ethical things a sports fan can do

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Matt Provenzano

[Home Run Baker comes to the plate] wonder what this prick's gonna do

personally feels like in 10 years people will just always pretend it was a mistake that should have never been done in the first place. but there was never anything to stop it when it was starting. ah shucks

The Israeli army says ground forces are “expanding their activity” in the Gaza Strip shortly after Israeli bombardment cut off internet service there

Israeli army says ground forces 'expanding their activity' in Gazaapnews.com Forces backed by fighter jets and drones carried out the second ground raid ahead of the widely expected ground invasion of the Hamas-ruled territory.

Cannot be overstated that the American public's Not Normal levels are reaching heights not seen in two decades

once again: jimmy carter is still somehow alive

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Matt Provenzano

Turn your HATERS into your WADERS, at the flooded subway station of SUCCESS.

Aides tell Mayor Adams that the floodwaters are threatening the deposits of minerals and gems beneath the New York City that give it its special energy. He hops into a city vehicle and drives it down the sidewalk to a restaurant owned by someone who has been imprisoned twice for Medicare fraud.