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I'm using this screenshot to practice not being mad
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This is like deadlifts for being not mad
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Great now I’ve hurt my back
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"honey, we're gonna have to put you on a performance improvement plan to focus on taking the garbage out. as you can clearly see on the asana board..."
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no they aren't. that's not true.
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my PM coworker told me she does relationship sprints with her boyfriend and got mad at me when I acted like that was insane
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Simple solution: go to couples therapy but just call the therapist your scrum master.
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No matter how hard I try, but every day I'm shocked straight couples manage to outdo themselves in being stoopid.
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“But babes, I was just using A/B testing to further increase the relationship value for the relevant stakeholders!”
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"here's your KPIs for next quarter, the expectations have gone up by 10% to ensure daily growth through challenges."
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Fuck, I need a spotter. I’m don’t think I can not mad this.
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Let's break up the set, start with the headline, then we'll take a breather, then we won't get mad at the photos, then after we rehydrate with some puppy videos, we can tackle the thoughts that a writer wrote this and an editor signed off on it one at a time. Then just join it all up.
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guys, if your wife puts you on a PIP ...
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Spray these people with firehoses
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We're one news cycle away from "daily scrum saved my marriage" and I wish that was a joke.
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You all realize this exact article gets written every 18 months (long enough for most people to forget). It’s almost onion level parody at this point.
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Yeah, I see it pretty frequently and that's why I'm doing not mad training with it
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Relationships are not agile software development or corporations. I haaate that they’re using these terms. But relationship checkins in a neutral location aren’t inherently bad. Polyam folks have been using similar techniques for years…
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When you have so much corporate brain rot you forget what "date night" and "checking in with your partner" are. Now how can we web3 this?
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Yeah, I’ll take the severance package. Thanks.
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Posting this is just outsourcing your anger.
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I’ve never seen anything more hilariously CA, particularly SF, than this headline. I do derive a certain amount of glee out of how miserable this is going to make the people who do this hahah Anyway if we’re talking job security even if the global civility collapses; I’m thinking ‘therapist’
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This makes me fear for the future of the human race.
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Oh good, I was wondering how we could neoliberalize regular check-ins with your partner, and, um… dates??
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Oh shit. I’m putting that on my puja table and using it for compassion meditation practice
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