kingchimp

@kingchimp.bsky.social

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chimp with a cowboy hat

currently unstapling nuts from leg

Posts Replies Media

I’ve heard all this before Your emotions make you a monster

cannot believe that moron vance was picked for VP

tom macdonald is about to drop the most insufferable song

great now i’m not be able to be on the internet for like 2 months now without seeing some batshit stupid opinion about trump

a methhead named kathy with shitstained drawers has moved into the parking lot of my work. will update on stuff she does throughout the week or so

earlier today, she pissed in one of the chairs we use to take breaks out back of the bar. like, sat down, and started pissing as though it were a toilet. i was told someone sanitized the chair but im not sure. avoiding for now.

she has now attempted at least twice to sneak into the bar and we’ve had to shoo her away back outside. she has also expanded her fallout 76-esque base further along the ditch, so she’s digging in. she’s currently screaming “FUCK THIS FUCKING SHIT LETS IT ALL FUCKING BURN!!!!”

Reply to

Brendel

as a dark souls fan, i concur that they look like they smell like feet

Reply to

Uncle Clit

No, that’s dog food

american politics is so fucking broken we can’t even properly be mad about SCOTUS. There’s too much infighting to get anything done

SCOTUS should be forced to do a press conference every month

Reply to

drewtoothpaste

government sounding more and more like aperture science every day

return to a monarchy anyone?

all hail king biden

i’m amazed no one has shot morrisey yet

i’m in no way saying i want him shot, im just saying im surprised he hasn’t summoned the wrath of a deeply unwell republican yet

after learning that JRR Tolkien based the Orks off of british football fans, the shadow of mordor games become way funnier

you’re telling me a bunch of liverpool fans took over mordor? like hell lmao

i think a witch has put a hex on me

i think julian assange should be set free and continued to run wikileaks

just saw that they gave him a deal where gets to walk free. they should also give him a million dollars

too autistic for social interaction not autistic enough to be confident in what I do just autistic enough to be completely fucking embarrassed of my myself in public

a stroke would fix me

*takes huge hit of weed vape* happy memory day or whatever

i feel clinically insane what the hell

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