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You should see how enormous my new underpants are. (WINK)
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Like the ones Pee-Wee Herman had?
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Pretty close. Pret-ty close.
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*hops in your wilderness green metallic Subaru Outback* me: ok let’s see these things
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TURBO. JERRY. (shakes head) REMEMBERING DEETS LIKE A LOTHARIO OVER HERE.
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it’s all the fuck i do (bc i love you)
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SO...uh...got a plan for the old ones? Just gonna...throw 'em out? Or...
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I was going to sew a giant mascot costume out of my old underpants. Because I'm really into upcycling? Just because they were $14 on Amazon four years ago and have excessive pantyliner adhesive residue on the crotch doesn't mean they don't have value!