Taylor

@sentientcake.bsky.social

Followers

Following

100

Posts

George Soros pays my rent. Sports talk. Comedy podcast junkie. He/him

Posts Replies Media

Today was like 2 inches away from being so badass

It’s been in the high 90s all week and I’m just so excited that every summer for the rest of my life will be hotter than the one before it. We did it gang.

I’m done with LMAO from now on I will LMBO (laugh my balls off)

I wonder if the hand basket that we’re going to hell in is even pretty.

Reply to

House

Who amongst us hasn’t flirted with selling feet pics?

Reply to

Screamer Jim

He gives a good breakdown and the answer is hell yes he would be.

I’m embarrassed to admit this but I did fall out of a coconut tree.

Reply to

House

I’ve really liked using “rippin darts” lately.

You’re not going to believe this but I just saw a woodchuck chuck a whole bunch of wood.

My project 2025 is all about finding out how to live laugh love

Started boofing my mood stabilizer and I’ve never been more level headed.

Kawhi Leonard quitting the Olympic team after one practice and picture day is incredibly on brand. Anyway, I’m excited to meet my teammates! See you in Paris!

We all just accept clothes shrinking every once in a while when we do laundry. When I’m president selling clothes that shrink in the wash will be illegal and punishable by being shrunk “Honey, I shrunk the kids” style.

Reply to

This should be a crime.

Probably magnets!

Oh ok that’s a reasonable price. Thank you I appreciate the response.

Reply to

Savage Grace

Do you have to use the cones that come with it or can you use your own pre-rolls?

First they Frenched my fries now they’ve Frenched my Cheerios? What’s next? Hopefully me…😏 P.S they’re very good

The most disturbing thing about the original 1932 “the mummy” is that the cheapest option to watch it is to rent it for 4 dollars.

Reply to

DisMoviePod

Think of all the sweet sweet hip and groin gains that must be on the way

If drakes next album isn’t his best album he is cooked. The chance of that happening is so incredibly low. Life is good.

We need to keep studying goblin mode. I think we can get people that suffer from it back to gnome mode, like the good lord intended.

Reply to

House

If I had a nickel for every time Droopy the dog pissed on my leg…I’d probably have about 35 cent. 40.

“Fuck you dude” isn’t “real weird shit” when you got caught saying something dumb. It’s real weird to subtweet people you’ve blocked if you ask me.

Was almost asleep then I remembered that 1895 French silent short film where the train comes right at you. Now I’ll be up all night. Great.

Reply to

Nails Nathan

Rap snitches, tellin all their business. Sit in the court and be their own star witness. DOOM is always relevant

Reposted by

Taylor

Defending her 81-year-old husband in the wake of his highly criticized debate performance, first lady Jill Biden reportedly assured an audience of Democratic donors Monday that she “hit[s] that on the daily,” referring to President Joe Biden.

Jill Biden: ‘I Hit That On The Daily’www.theonion.com EAST HAMPTON, NY—Defending her 81-year-old husband in the wake of his highly criticized debate performance, first lady Jill Biden reportedly assured an audience of Democratic donors Monday that she “h...

I’ve been going to McDonalds four times a week for over a year now to pick up/drop off clients for work and I haven’t gotten food once. I think I deserve a medal or something. Probably the Medal of Honor. 🤷‍♂️

Does accidentally reading the word “tidy” as “tiddy” qualify me as chronically online?

Watching T2 and I don’t understand why both terminators don’t hang dong in the beginning. James Cameron is a coward.