Ethan “Fink-Nottle” Kocak: Do not put me in a starter pack, I am an intermediate to advanced species and require an experienced keeper and a specialized enclosure.

Do not put me in a starter pack, I am an intermediate to advanced species and require an experienced keeper and a specialized enclosure.

I do not thrive in captivity and should not be in anyone's starter pack. You probably need a whole apprenticeship and special permits to even think about adding me to your collection.

And even then you might lose an extremity.

Despite my adorable exterior, I am a wild animal and will definitely bite. So far no efforts at taming have been successful. I am however, some what easy to befriend with food.

🔥

Your humidity requirements alone are far too involved and fussy for a new user.

Are you a Pokémon?

According to some

Do you fit into a handheld ball?

Possibly a newt tank, given his handle.

He’s 3 newts in a trenchcoat.

i thought he was 300 newts in an Ethan suit.

That’s a much better description than what I came up with. 🤣🤣🤣 But also, creepy as fuck.

Yes, that's our Ethan.

Same

Same same

If you get it you get it, I’m with ya

I've got a long-dead Volkswagen in the garage, that should work fine, right?

I require too much care when talking to me.

We all do

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