hello kelsey

He's absolutely right to recognize the appalling dearth of giant mechanical spiders on film, which remains an enduring shame of the medium. And not only that, he's putting in the work to correct it.

just some stuff on my phone

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hello kelsey

The snake from the Gadsden flag fell in love with the bear from the California flag and they are spawning a new generation of cryptids that are competent at both social media and SEO

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hello kelsey

all british opinion pieces are like "The Surprising Advantages of Weeing in Cans of Beans by Aleister Pisserwinkle"

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hello kelsey

CLOUDS HATE YOU

thinking of making stickers that say wet strawberry is a punk band (willem dafoe is a member) so that people don’t get confused

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hello kelsey

first date idea: you watch me pace around the living room while i list off a substantial number of hollywood actors i’m convinced are “compromised”

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hello kelsey

guy who has the politeness version of tourette’s

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hello kelsey

Self-Harm

Labeled by Bluesky Moderation Service

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hello kelsey

Goldfinger he's the man the man with the Midas touch A spider's touch Such a cold finger beckons you to enter his web of sin But don't go in Golden words he will pour in your ear But his lies can't disguise what you fear For a golden girl knows when he's kissed her It's the kiss of death from Mister

a lot of you have been asking me for my thoughts on this and i’m finally comfortable enough to state that hollywood film producer jon peters is right to want to put a giant mechanical spider in every movie he touches