Pretty Fly for a Cat Guy (warning: unreliable narrator)

@majima.club

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🏳️‍⚧️ Cat-loving disabled genderqueer autistic. He/she/they Kamurocho’s #1 Majima simp, pin, bug, and plant enthusiast, kitten wrangler. Passionate about creating trans joy. ACAB, even yr dad

“LANGUAGE IS A LIVING THING, BEARDO” - Noam Chomsky, maybe

Posts Replies Media

Reply to

Milkdud

He’s okay, that’s all I care about. His mom is going to reimburse me and they’ve extended my care for him until they’re home. I couldn’t stand the thought of anything happening to him.

Reply to

DrunkGrunkle 🗡️Guts Arc

Why am I envisioning hundreds of tiny Regans from the Exorcist right now?

Sweet baby boy is home and resting. I made it home too and am putting copious amounts of mozzarella balls and steak cubes into my face before I pass out. Enough excitement for today thanks.

Praise the fucking lord they’re giving me a professional discount because I’m a vet tech hashtag miracles are real

Good news is that the bloodwork shows he’s stable, he won’t have to be admitted, and we can get some treatment and go home. They said I probably saved his life catching it early and getting him here though. I’m legit shaking with relief.

Reply to

Homeless JJ 🏳️‍⚧️

He’s super important to me. ❤️

Reply to

Larisa LaBrant

The most important thing is he’s okay. We are cuddling on the ER couch and he’s making biscuits. I’m shaking but okay. Being a vet tech for 22 years has me where I can shut off my brain and handle an emergency situation professionally but once it’s over I’m an autistic mess who needs a Klonopin.

Reply to

Hawthorntree

Nah, just a vet tech. Not only did I take an oath, I’m VERY serious when I tell people I will love and care for their cats like they’re my own.

Fortunately him having a stress tantrum in the car dislodged the blockage and he emptied about half his bladder in the carrier. They were able to empty it the rest of the way here at the ER and it was bloody. He feels better, clearly. He’s cuddling me on a little sofa.

Really glad my other client just paid me for a week of work in cash. I can cover it and probably some more pain meds and fluids to buy us some time. Please send love to him and good vibes to my poor overwhelmed autistic brain because I am about five minutes from a meltdown

Reply to

tofu & tesla! (& krisko) 🍉 ♿

Sending love ❤️

Cannot get in touch with his mom. He’s in so much pain and struggling. I called the ER and got a cost for the exam - at the very least I can get him seen and maybe some bladder relief.

My nightmare has come true, y’all. The sweet tom cat seems to be blocked. He was screaming in the box, squatting and nothing was coming out. I had to leave to do insulin so I gave him some gaba to calm him down and for the pain, and now desperately trying to contact his mom while I turbo drive back.

This is exactly why I swipe disposable emetic bag-things from human hospitals. Or just…puke in the toilet.

Oh my god’ it was HUGE! And its a lasting meme. White people have barf bowls we also use for large salads and halloween candy and popcorn. Washed in between but white people washing so…

This reads like an ad for Shower With Your Dad Simulator 2015

Well you got your rich dads and poor dads and then you have your hung dads and short dads. Dads come in a great many variety

Best episode of TV I ever watched? "The Old Sugarman Place,” BoJack Horseman. Grief, isolation, mental illness, generational trauma, and the ugly reality that it was preferable for a person to be stripped of their entire being than be an inconvenient partner. It’s so hard to watch, but powerful.

Best episode of TV I ever watched? "Best" Is a bit of a stretch but damn fun LOL (Murder, She Wrote- Keep the Home Fries Burning)

Time for evening rounds. I’ve got a cup of cubed Gouda, a nut bar, a fruit pouch, some lemonade, and 5 hours left on an audiobook. - 2 outdoor cats - 2 kittens and an old gal - sweet old tom - 6 spoiled cats - 4 cats (1 diabetic) and chimkins - ringworm kitten to dip Then home to all my buttholes.

Too much pussy

Irreverent Hermit Nerd

I was literally just watching THE HOOP GAWD video so this made me fucking CACKLE

tha poop gawd

Reply to

forethoughtgirl

Haven’t made it yet - my schedule today and tomorrow is too packed, so I will likely not get to it until Tuesday. I’ve got so many clients im basically playing Jenga with my schedule. I’m about to go back out and won’t be back til after 10 (about 4.5 hours)

I’m really glad!

Woo!! Did you do something different?

Was legit about to throw my phone out the window when I was looking for a low-carb banana bread recipe because all of them use banana extract which FUCK THAT NOISE. Then I found this recipe and this note made me unreasonably happy. Trust science, your food will (almost always) taste better!

Reposted by

Pretty Fly for a Cat Guy (warning: unreliable narrator)

Unko Sensei (a poo-headed teacher) teaches Japanese kids how to write.

Today: Get eggs from chimkin I’m babysitting > trade half dozen for cantaloupe and overripe bananas > get surplus tomatoes, cucumber, pickles, and carrots from neighbor who received too much at church food bank > share produce with broke friend > everyone wins!!

Good news: The expired Miralax hidden in a mini Calpis did the trick! Bad news: it hit at the same time as the hot Cheetos and elote.

Got my first pedantic comment on YouTube and I handled it like an adult. Please clap.

Reply to

Carl Marx

I’m going to argue that you’re not in any way mid, and thereby have immunity.

Reposted by

Pretty Fly for a Cat Guy (warning: unreliable narrator)

A lot of autistic people exist in a world where people make it clear that we did something wrong, but hardly ever explain what went wrong. After enough of this, confusion, anxiety, and self-doubt become near-constant companions in social situations

Reply to

CHOAM Nomsky 💭

Synchronicity…I laughed unexpectedly at the conclusion to this and it elicited its own unintended fart.