The Onion: — Subium • Bluesky web client

Police Department Defends Decision To Buy Entire Fleet Of 1967 Ferrariswww.theonion.com CHICAGO—Dismissing concerns that funds were being mismanaged, the Chicago Police Department vigorously defended its decision this week to buy an entire fleet of 1967 Ferraris. “We will use these babie...

Just wait until the auditing team digs into this one: they paid for 275GTBs (article) but got far less valuable 330 GT 2+2s (photo) instead. Who pocketed the balance?

Oh lord that closing line.

oh man this gag should have been a '61 Ferrari 250 GT California for the Ferris Bueller tie-in

Better than the weapons of war they have been buying.

But only for the white shirts.

How very dystopian.

Well they need help with the take overs of city corners. Why not a car that can beat just about anything these "tire smokers" have? :)

BREAKING: Onion offices raided by police

Would have been more realistic if you said the police department used Civil Forfeiture to aquire the fleet of ferraris

Just in time for Furry Weekend Atlanta...

The headline alone is perfection.

Ferris Bueller's Day Off meets Cops

The NYPD uses them to drive their robots.

is it more telling of me or the state of the police system that i initially believed the headline

🤣👍🙏

lol these have been fire lately

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