cait: "i wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy" i would. that's the point of having a worst enemy. grow up and hate people like an adult

"i wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy" i would. that's the point of having a worst enemy. grow up and hate people like an adult

you can't even imagine the kind of things i'm wishing on my enemies. you would be driven to madness instantly

Honestly the instant painless death isn't for enemies, just people I dislike, the creative stuff that takes days is for enemies.

I’ve got a club. We have t-shirts.

Where do I send my membership application?

I think cait wraps her enemies in the t-shirts so they can't see or move and then beats them to a pulp with your club.

wu tang - torture.mp3

"Oh, you wouldn't wish that on your worst enemy? GET BETTER ENEMIES."

Yeah, there was a kid who bullied me in junior high. I routinely wished death on him and he was dead in less than a decade. I don’t feel any shame or regret over what I felt. He was shit.

your powers

They picked a terrible century to abandon me, I tell you what.

My grade school bully... Hadnt thought about him in years until the day he hit on and harassed my high school gf at her job in a mall food court. He was decapitated in a car accident later that night.

I got super mad at a kid who shoved me off a swing so he could have it in middle school so I cursed him, and not 20 min later he fell off and broke both his arms lol

Manifest your dreams

I had to listen to way too many “power of positive thinking” tapes growing up, I guess.

In high school, I specifically visualized a teacher suffocating and she ended up on a ventilator in the hospital but it was probably a coincidence. I figure it's still best to be on my good side, just in case.

👑👑

My favorite is still small inconveniences for people you think suck but don't consider the worst enemy. Small inconvenience: I hope you walk into a store chain that has a different set up to your usual one.

i hope they only have the brands of snacks you sort of like and not the brands you like

I hope your tap drips a trickle.

I hope every pair of socks you ever put on turns out to be wet

I hope your WiFi and cell data goes out for 3-5 minutes at a time, randomly throughout the day, at least twice an hour. Except for the occasional stretch of 24-36 good hours so you think it’s resolved.

This was so specific lol

Yes, this is how my friends and I like to curse people. Like, may you stub your toe every day.

May your grudges fuel your life force when all other fails

may the bridges i have burned light my way back home

we're off to find the hero of the da-ay but what if Cait should fall by someone's wicked wa-a-he-yeah

I was gonna get that tattooed once, I say gonna get that tattooed once but I was asked to leave for being very drunk before specifying the details

O hey!! You’re here!

I relate.

well did you find anything good??

I made my own. (This was in response to DeSantis passing SB 254).

This is how my best friend and I talk to each other.

Only the bestest of friends get messages like this from me

😹

When I had a bad dose of campylobacter I spent the whole week thinking of people I'd wish it on

I've found my people!

Wishing for bad things to happen to your worst enemies is amateur hour. Learn to curse them good and proper like the sorcerer you are!

curses!

I 100% wish the pain and suffering I've experienced with crohns disease could be weaponized and applied to idk like at least 30 to 40 people I could list.

Every day I wake up and hope she’s divorced and living with the parents she hates because without her husband she can’t afford literally any of her lifestyle.

My ex is living with her mother who she said I was crazy for suggesting she temporarily live with when I told her I didn't make enough money (only income earner) to buy a 3rd house for ex without selling the one we were in. Some days I'm not sorry for enjoying that just a little.

I mean, I would. In some ways being stuck living with someone you hate is comparable to being homeless.

It's not even that she hates her mom, it's that her mom is the Little Old Lady version of Colin Robinson, the energy vampire of What We Do In The Shadows. *shudder*

Oh lord. My friend’s husband was like that when I was living with them. As soon as he walked in the room both my friend’s and I were just hemorrhaging energy.

We had to tag team spending time with her when she would visit to be able to endure it. You just want to bash your head on a table!

sometimes it's worse

I 100% believe that.

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