Welcome to the future of The News. This is Newslop. This is InfoTrough. I'm Brett Oinker and this is the NewsSty. Today on The Slop we've got oodles and oodles of headlines. Forcefed right into your cerebral cortex. I'm Jimmy Sloppo and this is the Slop Bucket. Breaking news: I'm dead as a Horse
I love waking up late on a warm Sunday morning & spending time with my normal Hu-Man brood of many children 🥰
I love my sons; Astartes Martyr, and 🤖🌐🏍🌌
And my daughters; XxSylvanasWindrunnerxX, and The Rot
People do not wnat to hear this truth because it isnt "woke to say but i'm going to say it anyway. If you try hard enough you can shoot lasers out of your hands like Goku
My coworker just informed me that she's pulling her kids out of Catholic school because it's too woke now
Ladies and gentlemen...Catholicism has fallen
My coworker just informed me that she's pulling her kids out of Catholic school because it's too woke now
Ladies and gentlemen...Catholicism has fallen
“It's like these men they-“
“Mm ice cream so good”
“-don't know how to make themselves attra-“
“Yes yes yes”
“Yes yes yes”
“gang gang”
“Mm ice cream so good”
“attractive to women”
“Gang gang”
“Yes yes yes”
“they’re building the”
“Mm ice cream so good”
“modern world aro-“
[me telling my story how I survived a plane crash and lived on a deserted island for a year] it was crazy
[friend who once got a text from me where I accidentally called the grinch the grink] was the grink there?
i grimace as i finish the last of the sweet purple drink. i don’t think i can take anymore
“is that where they got the name?” trying anything to get out
the maniacal laughter stops for only a moment, as my dead-eyed captor moves toward me with the next feedbag
