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my husband wakes up earlier than me for work and so he lets the dog out
some mornings when he says bye he'll whisper into my sleeping ear, "Luka has diarrhea"
these are the first words i hear that day
i don't understand why frances would be like that
Gwen you must really be posting from hell
is he not? are you two not? well i'll be a baboons ass
why would you wish this upon me, your friend D
that's exactly what my dick asked when i started HRT
this is the equivalent of the 2am 4yo 'mom i frew up' wakeup
All these years and still with the dirty talk.
I'm just gonna pretend Luka is your hubs' name
i thought this was gonna be a baha men joke but here we are
better to be prepared when the pooch has the skootch
I hope that is your dog's name!!
if this ain't love, i don't know what is
three words to drive her crazy
" ... don't slip and fall."
Better wake-up mechanism than an alarm clock right??
Does he (Redacted)(outdated cultural reference)
And they say romance is dead
I keep trying to figure out how to slip in the “I love you. Have a good day!” 😂😂😂😂
(Luka looks up coyly knowing he has your attention)
So romantic. My heart melts.
Better than hearing "You have diarrhea"
"Luke has diarrhea. Gotta go!"
