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very honestly coming around to the view that the paradigm of non-toxic, community-driven masculinity we need can be shorthanded by "dudes rock"
It's fun to slag on teenage boys but IMO they're not so much ideologically right-wing as they are desperate for the approval and mentorship of older dudes a lot of the time, and we are letting them down on that score (either by trying to indoctrinate them or not interacting with them at all).
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curiosity, perseverence, fellowship, sprawl: it's all there!
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One problem is that we don't actually believe these are "masculine" qualities. At least I don't
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I think we've lost, or at least had to retreat from, that battle. The world's not ready to ditch the idea of "masculine" vs "feminine" traits. Encouraging constructive masculinity beats the hell out of toxic masculinity and would make the world safer than it is now. It's not nothing.
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It's a very tough pill to swallow, but also I don't want to be like those people who oppose incremental progress because they can't have the whole thing all at once.