Adam Sharp

@adamcsharp.bsky.social

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1. Writer (https://www.adamsharp.me/)
2. Obsessed with lists
3. COMMON PEOPLE
4. THE CORRECT ORDER OF BISCUITS
5. THE WHEEL IS SPINNING BUT THE HAMSTER IS DEAD (http://geni.us/yDxa)

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Bournville in the USA

Happy World Chocolate Day to all who celebrate! Here’s a special playlist I made for the day… 10. Arctic Munchies 9. Tobleronan Keating 8. Bay City Rolos 7. Björkie 6. Picnic! At The Disco 5. Right Said Freddo 4. Jimi Hendtwix 3. Penguin Stefani 2. Everything But The Twirl 1. Jefferson Aero Plain

An Englishman walks into a Swiss bank. He goes to the teller, puts his face close to the glass, and whispers, “I have 2 million pounds and need to open a secret Swiss bank account.” The teller replies, “Sir, there’s no need to whisper. Poverty is nothing to be ashamed of in Switzerland.”

Big fan of this Swiss sign held up just before the English national anthem was played…

THE EUROPEAN CHAMPIONSHIPS FOR IDIOMS: Netherlands vs Turkey 🇳🇱 A slang Dutch name for a wimp or a coward is papkindje, or “porridge kid” vs 🇹🇷 A Turkish equivalent is muhallebi çocuğu. It means “child of pudding.” Or, if you prefer, you could translate it as “custard boy”

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Rwanda ticket paid, tardigrade

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Victoria De Capua

Sayonara, capybara

THE EUROPEAN CHAMPIONSHIPS FOR IDIOMS: Portugal vs France 🇵🇹 The Portuguese version of “I’m on cloud nine” translates to “I’m on my seven farms” vs 🇫🇷 A French was of saying you are well or happy is “I have the potato”

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I'll help you pack, Rishi Sunak

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Shift your face, Ricky Gervais.

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Put that away, Louis C.K.

THE EUROPEAN CHAMPIONSHIPS FOR IDIOMS: Spain vs Germany 🇪🇸 A Spanish way of saying “nobody asked you” translates to “who gave you a candle for this vigil?” vs 🇩🇪 An equivalent phrase from German is “no pig is interested in that”

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Vamoose, bull moose

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Out the door feral boar

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Get to Rwanda, foreign Red Panda

A list of eight cute animal rhymes to say farewell... 8. In a while, crocodile 7. Toodle-oo, kangaroo 6. Ciao for now, Jersey cow 5. Why you still here, white-tailed deer 4. Just piss off, luna moth 3. Go to hell, red gazelle 2. Kiss my hole, woodland vole 1. Off you fuck, crested duck

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Ten shows about the Tories’ time in power: 10. Meal or No Meal 9. Mock the Weak 8. Never Mind the Buzzwords 7. Whose Lie is it Anyway? 6. Who Wants to Be a Billionaire? 5. Last of the Summer Wine and Cheese 4. White Line of Duty 3. Faulty Powers 2. Have I Got an Excuse for You? 1. 8 Out of 10 Prats

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in turkish we say “götümde ayı bağırıyor” which means “a bear is shouting on my ass”

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In Italian you say “non do il resto”, ie “I can’t give out any change” like you’re the busiest cashier ever

My favourite phrase for being busy from the US South is “I'm as busy as a one-legged cat in a sandbox.” My favourite Aussie variant is a toss-up between “flat out like a lizard drinking” and “as busy as a centipede on a hot plate.” Anybody know some fun ones from other languages?

THE EUROPEAN CHAMPIONSHIPS FOR IDIOMS: Romania vs Netherlands 🇷🇴 A slang Romanian version of “every cloud has a silver lining” translates to “a kick in the ass, a step forward” vs 🇳🇱 A very old (16th century) way of saying “it is what it is” in Dutch is “who knows why the geese go barefoot?”

You don't need to pay for an app to turn hard books into easy books, for I will happily do it for free. Here are some examples of my work...

THE EUROPEAN CHAMPIONSHIPS FOR IDIOMS: Portugal vs Slovenia 🇵🇹 In Portuguese, a rollercoaster is called montanha-russa, or “Russian mountain” vs 🇸🇮 In Slovene, a rollercoaster is more commonly known as vlakec smrti, which means “little train of death”

THE EUROPEAN CHAMPIONSHIPS FOR IDIOMS: France vs Belgium 🇫🇷 A French phrase for being down in the dumps is “I’m sad like a meal without cheese” vs 🇧🇪 A Flemish way of saying “this will make you feel better” translates to “this will frog you up”

THE EUROPEAN CHAMPIONSHIPS FOR IDIOMS: England vs Slovakia 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 If someone comes into the house and leaves the front door open, an English dad might say “were you born in a barn?” vs 🇸🇰 A Slovak dad is more likely to say “were you born with a yoke up your ass?”

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My two favourite Swedish idioms are “that’s better than a snail on the eye” for “better than a poke with a sharp stick”, and when someone looks sad “you look like you sold your butter and lost the money” which is a story I just immediately empathise with

THE EUROPEAN CHAMPIONSHIPS FOR IDIOMS: Germany vs Denmark 🇩🇪 A German way of saying OMG, from the 1980s, is Ich glaub mein Hamster bohnert! It means “I think my hamster is waxing the floor!” vs 🇩🇰 My favourite Danish equivalent translates to “take a whole vacation!”

THE EUROPEAN CHAMPIONSHIPS FOR IDIOMS: Switzerland vs Italy 🇨🇭 My favourite animal-themed insult from Switzerland is Murmelifigger, which means “marmot fucker” vs 🇮🇹 My favourite of the Italian pig phrases is the old “damn it” equivalent porca miseria! It means “pig misery!” (or “pork poverty!”)

THE EUROPEAN CHAMPIONSHIPS FOR IDIOMS: Czechia vs Türkiye 🇨🇿 A Czech name for a know-it-all is rozumbrada, which means “wisdom chin” vs 🇹🇷 A slang Turkish term for a smart-aleck is herbokolog. It means “every-shit-ologist”