Bethany Black

@bethanyblack.bsky.social

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Comedian, Actor, Writer, multiple Moral Panic survivor, trans since before it was an issue. One of life’s winners. Check out my website for tour details www.bethanyblack.co.uk

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Bethany Black

I guess you could say... Le Pen is not mightier. www.theguardian.com/world/live/2...

French election 2024 live: exit poll shows shock win for left-green alliance as far right falls to thirdwww.theguardian.com New Popular Front predicted to get 172-192 seats, with Marine Le Pen’s far-right RN and allies down in third

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Bethany Black

Why is it only umbrellas in fancy drinks? Put a raincoat in there. I want a storm shelter the size of an ice cube.

This last week seems to have ushered in a new golden age of people not fully understanding statistics or how numbers in elections work. People who are otherwise sensible approaching the numbers like Deepak Chopra about to say something “uses quantum”

Reskeet with a tweet you still think about

reskeet with a tweet you still think about

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Bethany Black

Reply to

Viktor Winetrout

This is the one Ben did that got me the most. I was in tears laughing.

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Bethany Black

why did we stop sending men to the moon. So many men could fit up there

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Bethany Black

said i'd love her if she was a worm a bit too enthusiastically and now she definitely thinks i'm desperate to fuck a worm

Good morning

Even the Tories aren’t mad she kept her own last name

This is one of the weirdest stories I’ve seen today.

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Bethany Black

Long story short, replacing the kitty litter with Pop Rocks wasn't a good idea.

Just remembered one of my pals was a Hollyoaks “hunk” back in the day, and did a photoshoot for their calendar, and when it turned up they’d just photoshopped his head onto a better body 😂

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Bethany Black

If Gavin Rossdale’s band’s greatest hits album isn’t called Full Bush then what is even the point of all this.

Last night I think a lot of people learned a very valuable lesson in the small village where I did a gig, and that is, if you go to a comedy gig in a small village where you live, don’t mock a comedian’s disability in a way that will lead to an angry mob of 80% of the women waiting outside for you

“Oh you think this election is a laugh riot, don’t you? Well I’ll tell you something that’s not so funny. Right now Rishi Sunak is at home crying like a little girl”

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Bethany Black

This guy was such a G for telling his evil wizard cyborg boss that his religion is bullshit during a work meeting.

Turns out there are two Welton Village Halls in the East Midlands. I discovered this as I turned up at a very closed Village Hall 90 minutes drive away from the gig I was supposed to be opening 10 minutes after I got there. Here now, and closing. Phew!

Liz Truss’s greatest hits youtu.be/rX5En0JpIFk?...

Just Liz Truss being absolutely mentalyoutu.be Foreign secretary is bookies' favourite to be the next prime minister. It's deeply, deeply concerning.Follow us on Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@politicsj...

How small is she?!

The auto subtitler just called Rishi Sunak “Richy Snack”

In my constituency there was a 4.7% swing to the Greens where they got 13.7% of the vote and 4,663 votes, up from 3,601, obvs our seat is weird as the Greens are the only major party standing, but last time the nutter protest candidate came second.

A total of four seats for the Greens, up from one, and Lib Dems up a massive 61 from 8. There's a story there, and the story is there are people who are left-leaning, but cannot vote for labour with a clear conscience. (Climate change ignored and anti-trans rhetoric.)

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Bethany Black

Whenever I see Ed Davey I expect him to finish what he’s saying by going “I’m Ed Davey, Welcome to Jackass”

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Bethany Black

Reply to

Smallbrainfield

Might go and look at the lettuce board before they take it down out of pure embarrassment. bsky.app/profile/samu...

Live right near the border for South West Norfolk constituency, saw a big ‘Vote Truss’ board in a field - someone had stuck a lettuce over her face.

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Bethany Black

Kelly-Jay Keen aka Posie Parker received 196 votes in the electorate she stood for, meanwhile, this woman won the seat with over 24,000 votes

My wife “who does he represent?” Me: “Monster Raving Loony Party.” Her: “Not Reform?” Me: “no”

jacob rees-mogg has to lose while standing next to a guy wearing a baked beans-themed balaclava

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Bethany Black

jacob rees-mogg has to lose while standing next to a guy wearing a baked beans-themed balaclava

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Bethany Black

Can’t even have a Tory government anymore because of woke

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Bethany Black

British politics is the absolute stupidest thing in the world and I love it.

Renaissance art.

Good morning

Off to bed, no time for these cunts. In the morning people we start again.