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never been more convinced of a theory in my life
is it time to bust out my "bigfoot is bears" photo collection again? if your mental image of a bear is a thick-furred, fat glossy male bear in autumn, you're probably not prepared for how weird their proportions can look in spring, or when walking upright, like they frequently do.
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I have been swearing this for years, as a native Oregonian, because if Bigfoot was real, we’d have sold him weed by now.
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I’m not convinced Oregonians wouldn’t try to sell weed to a bear. Or at least just give a bear brownies and film what happens.
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Weed Bear, the tonally very different sequel to Cocaine Bear.
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i was under the influence of cocaine bear when i smoked weed bear. i'm sorry.
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I’m told you can’t kill shroom bear in a way that matters
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Kentucky did cocaine bear. 🤷🏻‍♀️
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To be fair it’s hard to rule out I haven’t stood next to Bigfoot in line some days at an Oregonian dispensary
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I am told that if one butchers a bear, the fat deposition and overall anatomy are disturbingly human in appearance.
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There was a huge search for a missing child here in AL when someone found what they thought was a disembodied child’s hand. Turned out to be a bear paw a poacher didn’t bother to take after field dressing his kill.
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If bigfoot were real, he'd have opened his own dispensary by now.
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All it takes is one friendly dealer who can keep his mouth shut.
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a very scraggly late spring bear ran in front of my car once and my first thought was 'what is a guy in a bearsuit doing running around out here' so this checks out
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I remember watching one of those shows where hey hunt Bigfoot and a guy unironically said “It’s feeling really Squatchy out here”
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I don't think I've ever gone from "never heard of this" to "completely convinced" as fast as I just did.
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But how do we know they are bears and not Bigfoot? Checkmate.
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Bears. Bigfoot. Battlestar Galactica.
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I think about Paul Shepherd and his writings on bears just about every day. He sort of made this argument too
paulhoweshepard.files.wordpress.com
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Shepard* good god autocorrect why do you do this but let me keep words like fsyzgld
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Years ago I was an RCMP officer in Northern Saskatchewan. On more than one occasion someone found a piece of severed, skeletonized bear anatomy, and it's -close enough to human- that we would have to get it ID'd by a medical specialist to confirm it wasn't Human Remains.
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WOW, I did not know they were that close!
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Blair Braverman used to talk abt this on Twitter - their dogs would eat bear paws and it looked very like people parts.
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Bears are mammals that walk with a similar bone arrangement as humans, i.e. heel-to-toe (plantigrade).
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I once spent a ghastly hot summer hour recovering badly degraded “sheep” remains from a swamp—I’ll spare you details, it’s one of the worst of my many grody tales—before realizing it was the remains of a hunted bear.
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I'm not squeamish so if you ever want to share I'm down! The only shit that really sets me off is fucking bigotry
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When you see a brown bear sprint, the look like a frikkin cheetah. There's a skinny animal inside that fur bag.
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seems at least bearly plausible
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Iseewhatyoudidthere
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well, at least there's the pun no one at all noticed involving a crime and someone's name. that surely doesn't deserve attention from the automated bot.
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This was so cold it was Arctic
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Y’all aren’t ready for skinny bear spring.
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Skinny bear spring means we get fat bear fall and I’m ok with that
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One of the Bigfoot shows I watched had an interview with an experienced hunter who had a sighting. He was 1000% certain it wasn't a bear, said he'd know a bear if it was one. He collected hair samples from the foliage the animal was rubbing on. The analysis comes back: bear.
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I straight up thought the first picture was a gorilla
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Incredibly convincing photo!
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i once met a guy who does Bigfoot hoaxing in his spare time