Salty MacTavish

@saltymactavish.bsky.social

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Starting each day with a lusty Wilhelm scream
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaalp2rwdye36
Here’s our wicked pissah Etsy shop: https://www.etsy.com/shop/KitchenTableWorks

Posts Replies Media

Just slammed a kombucha and put my crocs in sport mode – let’s do this

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Salty MacTavish

Joel McHale saying fuck you on a loop is my inner light.

Thank you for your party invitation. Will it be squatchy?

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Live, laugh, lick the toad

The birds are pretty sparse this time of year. I figure they’re all down on the Cape stuck in traffic looking for a clam shack

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Salty MacTavish

if a salesman comes to your door with nutritional supplements be sure to invitamin

Did I ever tell you about the time I found a musket ball deep in the pith of a white pine? Well settle down on yonder stump, shoestring. Here’s some strong water

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Salty MacTavish

My Jay, the happy little peanut thief He’s got several in there already, but it took some work to get this peanut in position so he could pick up six more & grin at me with peanut teeth 🤣📸🪶

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Salty MacTavish

slovenly eating and oinking in my slop trough

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Salty MacTavish

I was offered a waffle today on my walk and I called the police

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Salty MacTavish

God, I hope you’re shooting blanks

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Salty MacTavish

Former stray sanctuary CEO logging on

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Salty MacTavish

Here, in the UK, a handshake is legally binding. So far today, I’ve accidentally married seven people

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Salty MacTavish

I could not imagine having Biden's authority and not using it to turn a 450lbs sack of worm crap into golf course fertilizer.

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Salty MacTavish

Cut me open and count the rings of despair.

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Salty MacTavish

Live Laugh Limp Bizkit

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Salty MacTavish

Voluntarily going into work on Sunday because it’s better than spending time alone with me.

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Salty MacTavish

this is how my posts are written

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Salty MacTavish

We should all raise our frequencies, lads

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Salty MacTavish

Good morning.

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Salty MacTavish

She’s a ten but she’s lingering on the rocky shore on grey misty days. She’s shimmering with the electric blue light of a reflective sea. Shes a ten but I’m worried she’s the ocean becoming mortal. Shes a ten but I fear that she might forget that I can drown.

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Salty MacTavish

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Salty MacTavish

Used to?

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Salty MacTavish

They have a little fence around the outdoor seating area so me and the one-eyed squirrel perform right in front of that

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Salty MacTavish

They’re like I’m with the felon. Completely disregarding the raping of women and pillaging of state secrets like the pieces of shit they are.

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Salty MacTavish

Ran out of shampoo so I washed my hair with Ranch dressing and now these seagulls are following me around like I’m the most discount Snow White ever.

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Salty MacTavish

i like bsky because it’s a diverse melting pot of numerous psychiatric disorders

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Salty MacTavish

Reply to

Father Jim's Flapjacks

Not touching that with a ten-foot pole.

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Salty MacTavish

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Salty MacTavish

My flag still says "flappejackken" which is the olde English for "to flip the leathery wheat"

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Salty MacTavish

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Salty MacTavish

This is how a good community takes shape. You are doing Gods work, truly