Hayes Brown: an earthquake three days before a total eclipse of the sun would absolutely have taken out a whole ass dynasty back in the day

an earthquake three days before a total eclipse of the sun would absolutely have taken out a whole ass dynasty back in the day

I hope nobody sees a freaky bird

Should we send down some Canada Geese to act like freaky birds?

Hun, your geese haven't left the tristate area in decades...

We can send more....

Well the ones that are up there are probably still less polluted so maybe we could roast some up.

I mean, go for it, but I expect casualties on both sides to be high

There's a lovely periodic comet, 12P/Pons-Brook, which may be daytime-visible during the eclipse. Also lightning very recently struck the Statue of Liberty If T Coronae Borealis goes nova on the 8th, the jig is up.

The owl died, that's probably not a good sign.

ALL birds are freaky.

FREAKY

Hellbeast

Dinosaur

(This is I think my favorite photo I have ever taken.)

we need it tho, to eat all the cicadas

The priestly caste that failed to foresee it...hope they didn't have weekend plans, they're getting burned at the stake.

🙏🙏🙏

The official kickoff to barbecue season.

can't wait to see what conspiracies will pop up on Facebook

“It’s an election year”

See my first thought was that you were quoting Venkman in “Ghostbusters”

Could be

I once had a coworker who believed Obama used his weather control machine to cause Superstorm Sandy to get reelected.

😐

This was moored within sight of my house and it would always disappear out to sea a few days before a hurricane approached. Coincidence? I think not!

So that's the floating palace of the Federal Weather Wizard.

I'm sure we'll soon hear about how D.E.I. caused the earthquake. 🙄

Somebody did gender near the fault line.

This is simultaneously hilarious and terrifying.

That's real tho

This will *absolutely* be blamed on the Jews.

[hides earthquake machine behind my back] it's absolutely disgusting the things people say about us

😂

Wait…is that an ECLIPSE MACHINE?!?

No that's the masons

Oh…kay. I thought they were in charge of hiding our national treasure or somesuch.

Nah, earthquakes are LGBTQ.

honestly I was waiting for them to blame Black people aka DEI. maybe they'll do an intersectional approach and blame Black Jewish LGBTQ people? 🤔

This has all the hallmarks of a space laser attack 👨‍🔬

Their attempts at intersectionality always resemble crosshairs...

You're right. The Q is for "quakes"

We got the drums of thunder and we got the pink lightning; we’ll make your earth quake and your heart shake.

You're thinking of hurricanes, at least according to southern preachers.

This references the Talmud so maybe it's a team effort.

Does Gay Sex Cause Earthquakes?www.theatlantic.com

Man, it’s a good thing this stuff isn’t real because it is *bananas*

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