Jon close

@joeyclose.bsky.social

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Wealth editor and formerly credit guy at with intelligence.

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Incredible how the news coverage of the new government is 'they've got these huge challenges that need to be dealt with', I guess because we all knew the last government was never going to deal with them?

Think 'group of bald men fighting over a comb' might stick around a bit.

My main anecdote about the election in my new constituency where Labour are looking for a huge swing, is that it's incredible how much I haven't seen the Tory. Bumped into the Labour guy twice now, everyone I've spoken to says they haven't seen their MP all term. The national stuff barely comes up.

Comedy film to be had in an alien that lands and is straight up a human, and has like nothing interesting to say about their planet because it's so similar, and the guy knows nothing about the things that are different. Maybe like one weird thing like they tend to walk on all fours.

Alien Theories xkcd.com/2953

Second best team with our flag tonight

Red arrows flying over distracting me from the goal there. Sneaky.

I've been googling this all day and can't find the paper it refers to.

Good news, everyone!

Winner of this one gets lombardi/lugano winner of the next one gets schleswig Holstein

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Well this is wild! Was looking up the Reform candidate for my constituency and found a website run by another Reform candidate where he’s listed. There’s also a helpful constituency map. Look at the place names towards the bottom. What do you see?

Tory stronghold election update. Labour candidate is everywhere, campaigns, posters, placards. 1 green placard seen, 1 Reform placard - I shit you not, down a private road outside a £2m house that's for sale. Literally no sign of the Tory.

I mean. It's seen me at my best and worst, and I've watched it let strangers take a dump on it. But we've never really spoken so it's hard to say.

How well do you know the New York City subway? Take our quiz to find out.

How Well Do You Know the N.Y.C. Subway?www.nytimes.com The New York City subway is arguably the most famous transit network in America. How well do you know it? Take our quiz to find out.

This is the one correct use of ChatGPT I've seen so far, presumably could also negotiate down like every subscription you have.

I use ChatGPT to write complaints and claim charge back under section 75 of the Consumer Credit Act. If my request is denied, I reply with another AI-generated wall-of-text until they give up and agree to at least a partial refund. Got 1,209 pounds in the last 6 months.

New Charles Tyrwhitt advert is edgy

Absolutely losing it at Boris Johnson's publishers advertising his memoirs like he's a serial killer being released on parole

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My new favourite chart: www.ft.com/content/1cc5...

People are talking about how and unprecedented the swing to Labour is, but it's worth remember the scale of riots and discontent during the last long Tory parliament. Maybe, they just have beliefs that are bad when in actual government, I dunno.

Not quite on topic, but people don't seem to understand the value in information curation, even within the news industry. Like, yes, you could reverse engineer some news stories from public information. But you wouldn't know to look, let alone where, unless you read the news first.

ok i have another quote tweet prompt. what's something, big or small, related to your job or hobby, that most people don't know that you would like to have them know? it can be a concept, a piece of history, some vocabulary, or something else.

oh man. It's just occurred to me that I could use ChatGPT to fulfil my lifelong ambition to reverse engineer philosophising novels that pretend to be the novel that really shitty films are based on.

Make a band less mild 30 seconds to Uranus.

Make a band less mild Boastful Mouse

chief investment officer magazine's website has a section for 'law enforcement'. Not sure what that tells us about the post-GFC finance industry. But it feels like something.

Actual conspiracy here to bring down inflation gradually by making sure no one person benefits from more than two of these price cuts at a time.

#deflation #️⃣#️⃣ www.washingtonpost.com/business/202...

Was checking out my new local MPs yesterday and the degree to which the Tory is phoning it in is pretty incredible. It was a safe seat now under threat and his pitch is Rwanda, I'm extending my house, and a dubious claim he built 2 academies in 14 years.

Make a band milder Bring me the bit over there in the middle distance.

make a band milder My Homeopathic Romance

Okay, I don't actually like the poppy thing in general. But it's still funny to lol at sunak being bad at it. If you're accused of being out of touch and standing next your rival and everyone is wearing poppies, wear a big, clear one, like what everyone else wears.

"Good work, Agent Sunak."

Belgium being number 2 makes the idea that anyone would be in Calais and get on a boat across the sea to England because of the benefit system especially laughable.

PSA

I currently live near the battle of britain memorial, and firstly it feels rude and weird to be annoyed by spitfires flying over all the time. But also, jeeze they're loud and annoying. This place must've been living with your head in a beehive during the war.

Isn't this like the exact thing Matt Levine used as a hypothetical recently? Except a bit dumber and fraudier?

Seems like Elon is harming Tesla—and its shareholders—to further the delusion that he's good at running Twitter. https://www.cnbc.com/2024/06/04/elon-musk-told-nvidia-to-ship-ai-chips-reserved-for-tesla-to-x-xai.html

Elon Musk ordered Nvidia to ship thousands of AI chips reserved for Tesla to X and xAIwww.cnbc.com Emails circulated inside Nvidia show that Elon Musk was telling the chipmaker to prioritize shipments of GPUs to X and xAI ahead of Tesla.

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heard someone say that we've had a period 'rich in changes of PM lately' which is an impressive attempt at a positive spin on things.

Bold choice to talk about having a plan for the country, when you couldn't even plan walking ten yards from your front door and making a speech without getting soaked and drowned out.

No thanks duo. No thanks.