Crockett Houghton

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Crockett Houghton

@crockettforreal.bsky.social

Writer of Novels & Comics & Jokes & Bios.
Virginia (for now) | https://linktr.ee/crockettforreal
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"After what he went through, he has my vote" Brenda, he already had your vote, you think ketchup is spicy.
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Is it normal for your therapist to challenge you to a fight
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We’re all trapped in a clown car hurtling towards disaster, metaphorically. And also literally, for a few unlucky clowns
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I bet birds and bees give their children really graphic explanations of sex.
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right?? probably putting miracle whip on their baked potatoes
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"After what he went through, he has my vote" Brenda, he already had your vote, you think ketchup is spicy.
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Having big boobs is annoying because you get to deal with constant back pain & when you suggest not wanting that anymore, random dudes climb out of the sewers to say "don't change what the lord gave you." Like, sorry Hank, but I didn't ask to be all titted up.
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I looked it up and it turns out there were zero book related deaths in 2023 and so far none in 2024 so, I don’t know, books may not be the problem.
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Maybe you aren’t really bad at cooking, maybe you’re just really good at ordering takeout. Life is all about perspective.
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Just got catcalled which normally would have made me so mad but I had my N95 on so props to that guy for supporting the covid conscious girlies.
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*feels like shit from being so online* me: i should get even more online
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[logging on] I'm sure no bizarre historical events have occurred on my birthday that I should know about
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Happy Birthday to you on this the day of your birth
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Imagine telling someone they shouldn't wear a belt, to just constantly let their pants fall to the ground, that they shouldn't live in fear of their naked lower body being revealed in public. That's as ridiculous as harassing those of us who still mask.
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The sketchiest Uber ride I've ever had was when I was on my way to get an octopus tattoo in the before times & the driver was like "Women shouldn't have tattoos. What would your future children think of that? 🤨" and I was like "I don't know, I have an IUD."
I get that. I have definitely had sketchier rides but yeah.
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my informal research on doomscrolling taught me many people yell at strangers on social media because it feels like an act of agency amidst unresolved trauma from Covid-19 and overwhelming systemic issues like anti-abortion legislation, climate change, inflation, and voter disenfranchisement
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Mask bans serve multiple purposes for fascism. They serve pandemic denialism to spread COVID as a bioweapon. They are also specifically intended to target Black & brown people in public legally. They are also intending to prevent protecting ourselves from government & corporate surveillance.
One thing I wish the (white) disabled people upset about mask bans would do more, is acknowledge how those laws are designed to harm Black and brown people first and we're just secondary or collateral targets
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you can actually write off all the people who blocked you on your taxes
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"Some people don't think masking is enough" Mask anyways.
Some of us have also read a lot on twitter and learned that most people who are covid conscious dont think just masking is enough. They also think that its unethical to not self-isolate forever. And even though many of us care we worry that the covid conscious community will just shun us anyways
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It's my birthday & I can yell about how disabled people are being pushed out of society (and left for dead) because no one masks so it's unsafe to go ANYWHERE & everyone is like "well, if I mask, it won't make a difference" instead of just masking up & not being a dipshit in a pandemic- if I want to
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