alan mustache

alan mustache

@danglinghemmie.bsky.social

12302

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we're all worms

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i mean, pogi put over 40 seconds to him in a single climb + descent

Gravel Influencer

not clear pogi is going to crack in the high mountains but roglic and remco most definitely will

jojo 🏄‍♂️ Creator of the PEU

definitely wasn't the dumb fucker who was complaining people kept walking across his grass to get around it

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when there’s a bunch of plants blocking the sidewalk, i think the homeowner should be tortured

i have certainly never taken my hedge trimmer out of the shed in the dead of night to solve this

Gravel Influencer

he hated riding to his potential too

WT riders are insane. this was an "easy" stage

it's a lifestyle maaaan

Screaming Pectoriloquy

w h o a

spend long enough online you start to see patterns in the posts, eddies and currents on the timeline. eventually these great rivers of content carve deep valleys in your subconscience. at Dunkin' see a donut, imagine two hands stretching it wide open. cancellation threads begin to haunt your dreams

Strava needs a mute button

kicked it up a notch once,

stepgrandmother what are yuou doing

what are you DOING??

apple watch sucks for that kind of stuff

that's probably not right

"oh no i got suspended from bluesky" so what it's like being banned from akron ohio you'll be fine

first spacex mars crew, floating tumor covered and frozen through, weightlessly drifting toward eternity

but but he did drugs and stuff, unlike the euros

i got kids too they don't know shit

i think it's European chauvinism mostly, they struggled to accept a little dude from Argentina is the greatest to ever play their game

Gravel Influencer

lol nah he's fast as fuck im getting to be the old guy

Gravel Influencer

last year a college team dude was giving me shit cause my legs weren't shaved and i just said "your mom likes to run your fingers through it" lol

Gravel Influencer

i have the same advice to anybody quoting The Rules at me

Chase 🚫🚫🇧🇪🇧🇪🚫🚫

because we're in hell dude

yeah and he's always been better

he won't stop until messi does

"zoomers think my socks are cringe" grow the fuck up home boy

Gravel Influencer

everyone gets a 200 CHF fine

he's plotting

im more of a huffer than a whiffer. wafting is not an option