unoservix

Profile banner

unoservix

@unoservix.bsky.social

paralegal. filled with monads.

he/him/his

🇺🇦 🇵🇸
Avatar
celebrating the birth of America by making it sound like eastern Ukraine out there
Avatar
lol it sounds like the Haradrim are gathering outside my apartment or something
Avatar
THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE: wow could the lakers be any more obnoxious THE LAKERS: hold our beer
Avatar
all you need to know about America is we would rather deny 100 eligible people the help they need than to let one person get it who doesn't need it
The absolutely wild thing is: This goes for ALL social aid. Just *giving people some fucking money,* literally going "OK, how much did you need?", cutting checks, and waving them out the door? COSTS LESS and HAS BETTER OUTCOMES than the current system's bureaucracy and means testing, EVERY TIME.
Avatar
Avatar
Normal Al Yankovic
make a band milder electric night light orchestra
Avatar
inhabiting that weird liminal space where you gave your two weeks notice but no one has yet responded or otherwise acknowledged it, AMA
Avatar
sometimes he can cook
Biden walks away from the lectern at the end of his press conference just now. Reporter: “Mr. President, can you tell us, sir: Donald Trump refers to himself as a political prisoner and blames you directly. What’s your response to that, sir?”  (pauses, turns back, makes this expression, walks away)
Avatar
Stormy Daniels: American hero, evidently
Avatar
Reposted byAvatar unoservix
Avatar
Nothing scream "personal safety" like "guy who used to be a cop, but now is driving an Uber for unspecified reasons"
The Kidnap Express is apparently trying to market to women in particular
Avatar
guess i better use that red lobster gift card, eh
Reposted byAvatar unoservix
Avatar
Every article about Red Lobster filing for bankruptcy is "ha ha endless shrimp, what did they think would happen" and then buried ten paragraphs down is the usual:
Reposted byAvatar unoservix
Avatar
Avatar
the mass normalization of Star Wars continues to surprise me. dude walks by me dressed as one of the Emperor's advisors, and i feel that momentary disbelief that my dweeby childhood has leaked out into reality like this
Avatar
bought a half gallon of oat milk for a woman who dumped me the next day so now i have a half gallon of oat milk to drink probably something poetic here
Avatar
on the bright side, outdoor fuckin' starts today
Avatar
just realized i'm one year younger than my father was when he had his stroke, so that's a thing, i guess
Reposted byAvatar unoservix
Avatar
Still one of my better pieces of writing
Avatar
people keep asking about my amount of spinal fluid and i mean...
Avatar
my therapist says my workplace environment is so toxic that if i was a minor, he'd consider it a mandatory reporter situation so that's cool i guess
Avatar
Avatar
my cat waits for me by the door to come back home and it is the most adorable thing, i am not taking questions
Avatar
holy shit, Akira Toriyama died?
Avatar
Reposted byAvatar unoservix
Avatar
The eye contact is really what makes this difficult
Avatar
being the only office open on your floor is kinda depressing
Reposted byAvatar unoservix
Avatar
The other site is reaching new levels of bot madness.
Avatar
all that meat and cheese and stuff aren't the only things getting smoked
i'll gladly give up a few years of my life if it means i don't have to talk to you during them
Avatar
i thought so much of bluesky that i elected to establish my shitposting here, in the web app so thoughtfully provided by our benefactors
welcome. welcome to bluesky. you have chosen, or been chosen, to relocate to one of earth’s finest remaining text-based social media experiences.