Justin

@jshoffstall.bsky.social

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Made with Real Vegetables

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I want jardiance's ad agency jailed

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My favorite part of this is how it first says that large employers can only dissolve these non-organizations for cause where cause is defined as: "the independent business judgment of the board of directors of the business of the large employer"

Not a populist: GOP VP candidate J.D. Vance introduced the Team Act (with Marco Rubio) to empower companies to establish and dissolve “employee involvement organizations” (a.k.a., company unions), a long-standing goal of GOP business leaders: www.rubio.senate.gov/wp-content/u...

www.rubio.senate.gov

DO NOT EAT

That's not a bandage, that's a desiccant pack.

Doctors and nurses: please tell me what circumstances would inspire you to apply an ear bandage like this.

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when you love a certain kind of tree and won't use any furniture made with it, call that ethical non-mahogany

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really interested to know how the Iranians thought they could assassinate Trump. For some reason when I first heard about it, I thought about the Libyans in the van trying to shoot at Doc Brown.

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Mike Johnson: "we are made in His image and because of that every single person has inestimable dignity and value*" *terms and conditions may apply

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Justin

lookathis fucked up cucumber

Like Benevento / and Lombardy

[extremely Living Colour voice] 🎶Look in my nose What do you smell? The scent of medievality🎶

I exploit you / Need feudal fees

[extremely Living Colour voice] 🎶Look in my nose What do you smell? The scent of medievality🎶

Perhaps you only know me by my nickname in professional circles.

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Justin

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Justin

Had a draft that was stressing me out and today I finally finished it by just sitting down and doing the work. I will learn nothing from this.

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ded

Oh my god

Jesus, oof

JD Vance is what happens when a McRib goes to Yale

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Justin

Our best chance with J.D. Vance is that one day at Mar-a-Lago Trump dares him to hold his breath underwater for five minutes or swallow a golf ball or something, you know because he’ll do it and that’s hilarious, and the problem takes care of itself.

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Justin

Look, if the guy wants to wear eyeliner, let him. I've learned not to make fun of people for their personal style choices. Now, Stephen Miller with the spray-on hair on Face the Nation? That's another matter entirely.

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The other term for a debbie downer is a Barbieturate

I’m speechless

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Justin

Daniel Craig looks like a hacker working for Hans Gruber

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Justin

She really said, “Retire, bitch.” (The “bitch” isn’t stated but is strongly implied.”

A senior House Democrat says efforts to replace Biden at the top of the ticket have stopped because, “We've all resigned ourselves to a second Trump presidency."

Trump rally shooting upends congressional Democrats' crisis over Biden's candidacywww.axios.com Rep. Dean Phillips said it would be "unpatriotic and unprincipled" to focus on anything besides the shooting.

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the general vibe at the moment

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Justin

Sina 🐾 Baby female Jack Russell Terrier Adoptable from Sevier County Humane Society (Sevierville, TN) https://www.petfinder.com/dog/sina-72396003/tn/sevierville/sevier-county-humane-society-tn97/

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Justin

Today is Septidi the 27th of Messidor in the year 232. Messidor is the month of harvest. Today we celebrate garlic. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/garlic

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Justin

Let the tail wags and adventures begin! Meet, Bourbon, located in Hemet, CA. Learn more: https://www.petfinder.com/dog/bourbon-72316055/ca/hemet/are-animal-rescue-inc-ca2705/

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I’m an actual pacifist. I want all guns banned. I just need the left to do less “violence is bad even when it happens to Trump” and more “this is the world Trump wants the rest of us to live in.”

If you appreciate my 1740's-based content, please subscribe to my Walpole-themed Substack, "Gettin' Whiggy With It"

The British are itching to invade St. Augustine again.

The UK is going to declare war on Spain and call it Second Jenkins's Ear, you watch.

Actually, same. At least until about '85.

I spent some amount of my childhood believing Richard Simmons and Slim Goodbody were the same guy