FRONT TOWARD ENEMY

@armyvet1972.bsky.social

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I’m neither politically correct nor incorrect. I’m just plain wrong.

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show me a picture on your phone that has your energy but isn’t a selfie

Sorry my hair isn’t combed but you did say RIGHT NOW

Challenge for the willing: selfie right now. This is my nightly bath time, yall. I’ll be deleting this one (and the previous because I’m no hussy) (jk maybe just a little) (I’m really not though. I’m abstinent.)

You can tell this app that you were born in the year 1 A.D.

I’m watching a demotivational video

music.apple.com/us/album/lik...

Reply to

La Captain Oblivious

She smells the bratwurst

This is the vibe I’m bringing to the Fourth of July party

Go into your photo roll or whatever and post the first image that makes you laugh literally out loud. HA!

I feel like so many men could have developed a personality if they spent a few more years in their race car bed

I’m sorry, Brentha, I will also need to go do a business trip recently. I’m sure that if you ask the neighbors of the street on your house they will agree and do. Present them with a fish as a show of good faith

Oh, where to even begin with this one

I bet this is Scarlett Johansson. She probably saw my beer belly on Instagram or something

If you guys are having trouble getting a girlfriend, all you have to do is say “hey baby, how would you like a little good old-fashioned peanut brittle?”

Six years ago at the lipstick lounge in Nashville. Angela Lese. (That’s Flip Cooper’s butt on the bass guitar.)

Reply to

Georgia the Explorer

It beats the chicken and water they’re planning at whatever this flyer is for.

Reply to

d.ly

A friend of mine has a business and she posted this last night so there must be a slug theme wiggling through the universe right now

I told the book what @whatthefoxy.bsky.social said and the book said ya damn right

Mark, I don’t want to know what size your briefs are. Also, I’m not even remotely flexible. Most importantly, I don’t swing that way.

Reply to

BEAVE ²

I ammm ooooookay that I’m notttttttttt ooooookay (I promise)

Reply to

Georgia the Explorer

I wonder whether you have any microplastics inside you. We’d like to get a sample of your penis tissue.

Reply to

La Captain Oblivious

Sorry for lying. my name is Jimi Hendrix

Going to hit the country Inn and suites with all one watt of that mighty Marshall power

This could possibly be the most insightful restaurant review I’ve ever seen

My son likes leaving reviews on Google maps for places he’s never been

When your religion tells you that God and the devil are the same

many people imagine Morgan Freeman’s voice as god, but I’m pretty sure god sounds like Guy Fieri

We saw you from across the bar and we were really digging your vibe

Reply to

Minister of Loneliness

Several years ago. Not even my fish. Wife handed me her pole and asked me to get the catfish off her line for her. My youngest son snapped the picture. Your theory has merit.