La Captain Oblivious

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La Captain Oblivious

@whatthefoxy.bsky.social

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Part-time reply gal. Silly goose activated. I tell dad jokes, so that automatically makes me your daddy.

Follow me, I can fix you.

I say things ⬇️

bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaanezoghr4iq
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Jimmer Cork-Bottle @jimmerthatisall.bsky.social · a day
This day in history. 1965. In Québec escaped convict Lucien Rivard was arrested after a five month search when police shrewdly thought to check his home.
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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 4 days
Tales of a fourth grade nothingness, that little Sartre gets all the attention but I can be pretty hell is other people too sometimes
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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 2 days
When people don't understand me I assume some of my words are from the past or the future and it's the time travel that's hard to follow
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garbage cock. @lscrapl.bsky.social · 6 hr
i'm like if an orange cat were a person
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Ash @ashhull.bsky.social · 5 hr
Killer whales like to play in the orcahestra.
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Xavier @xinicit.bsky.social · 18 hr
I’ve been pounding caffeine to wake up and now I’m just sleepy with a tummy ache. It is hard being so brave all the time.
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Xavier @xinicit.bsky.social · 2 days
How much extra does it cost to get a dominatrix to rub your scalp and tell you how brave you are?
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FK @funkelly.bsky.social · a day
magnum pee eye
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Frances Meh @francesmeh.reviews · 13 hr
this is going to be hard for a lot of people to hear and i really debated whether i should speak about the issue at all but it’s just too important to keep silent about any longer so here goes: some of you are liking my skeets but not reposting them. be better.
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alan mustache @danglinghemmie.bsky.social · 6 hr
recharging my phone using the friction between all of the people i follow who hate each other
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Ash @ashhull.bsky.social · 8 hr
My personality is caffeinated chaos. Daily.
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Miss Riss @missriss.bsky.social · 17 hr
Anybody got any big stuck boats or orca yacht sinkings? We need some uplifting content around here..
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Lizzy 💫 @stonedeva.bsky.social · 9 hr
Self actualized enough to know I need to be the weird one in any relationship
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𝓦𝔦𝔠𝔨𝔢𝔡 𝓖𝔞𝔯𝔡𝔢𝔫 @wickedgarden.bsky.social · 5 hr
Do coke nails require any special care?
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La Captain Oblivious @whatthefoxy.bsky.social · 6 hr
Mixed drinks 👍🏼 Mixed signals 👎🏼
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chris. @azedand2knots.bsky.social · 5 hr
I am the kind of person you show your rash, not your ween.
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Parilani 🫧 @parilani.bsky.social · 11 days
no one: me: *opening a pistachio shell with another pistachio shell* i'm like macgyver no one: me: so resourceful
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Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 8 hr
You’re laughing. I asked who’s on first and you’re laughing.
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Holly Brolightly @hollyholightly.bsky.social · 17 hr
house teen asked me to take him to goodwill. y’all need anything?
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Neener Neener Neener 🇨🇦🍁 @neenerneenerneener.bsky.social · 14 hr
For one month of vacation, there is booze in my coffee. For the other eleven, there are tears.
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Wilbur72 @wilbur72.bsky.social · 18 hr
If my penis could take notes that would be dicktation send horrid skeet
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Wilbur72 @wilbur72.bsky.social · 15 hr
Anyone else on the Highway to Hell? Hoping to find a rider so I can use the carpool lane.
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Frances Meh @francesmeh.reviews · 13 hr
singing katy perry’s roar like i’m the jetsons’ dog baying for his master
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Holly Brolightly @hollyholightly.bsky.social · 5 hr
rested my eyes so hard my body thinks it had a full night’s sleep 🙃
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One Dog’s Opinion 🐾 @onedogsopinion.bsky.social · 6 hr
a lost and found but for tangerine trees and marmalade skies
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future jefftopher🙋🏻‍♂️ @lacroixboi.lol · 9 hr
I recycle my La Croix cans so I can buy more La Croix to then recycle to get more money and then
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Jamestopher🏅 @tarnation.bsky.social · 6 hr
i should be able to sue mother nature
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La Captain Oblivious @whatthefoxy.bsky.social · 6 hr
Mixed drinks 👍🏼 Mixed signals 👎🏼
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Pot Shop Boy @potshopboy.bsky.social · 11 hr
My five year plan involved me dying at the end, but that point was 23 years ago, so I've just been winging it ever since.
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Pot Shop Boy @potshopboy.bsky.social · 10 hr
I'm like clickbait. You get all excited, then see me and go "oh wtf" before moving on with your life.