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dog at the engravers beat my ass
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she was MORTIFIED and i was like ma'am this will be gone in like 10 minutes i just bruise like a peach
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Scratches like that are the price of being loveable
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Big dogs are gonna leave marks, like I love you too bud but please, please don't jump on me, I will come down to you
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Sick temporary Nonster Energy tattoo
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At least you got some quirky supernatural romance book cover vibes out of the experience
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This could be a "whelp!" or a "record scratch" meme
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i bet you're wondering how i got here
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Me, bleeding from the face after snuggles wit da puppy, "no no I'm totally fine, your dog is so cuuuute"
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Lol, just met my aunt's pit mix for the first time and my arms are shredded and I love her!
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Ooh very much werewolf aesthetic
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yooo was that dog named cujo??
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It's like you got Eve's pawprint tattoos but for real.
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Cait the Warrior Queen returns from battle.
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Well stop engraving on the dogs! Are you mad?! Heh.
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I don’t care what dog or owner or it the animal is friendly and meaning to play. If a dog approached me and the front paws come off the ground, I’m ready with a powerful leg to block and if possible, forcibly reverse the momentum of somebody’s precious pet. I do not deserve to bleed for your pet.
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okay relax killer
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"I swear to god I will kick your fuckin' dog" is a seriously weird way to introduce yourself to the world.
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Sounds like a sketch from I Think You Should Leave
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Yeah, maybe triggered a little. I love dogs. Teach your dogs to not initiate play. Play starts when human says. This is just common sense. Did you initiate play with the dog? I should have asked that first.
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Have you considered that you're really weird and uncomfortable to interact with.
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As long as we're on about "initiating play", who initiated hearing your weird ass take on this. Like I hate dull-ass dog gougings as well but oh well, it's a dog it wants to be friendly.
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This move is even *more* effective on toddlers btw 😮
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guys love to make up hypothetical scenarios where they get to beat something up
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I constantly carry 2 katanas with me, just in case a dog attempts to play. The first katana stays in it's sheath to deflect the dogs attack. The second katana is to slay the owner who never taught the dog that play is a privilege. There is also a 3rd katana, but that is unrelated to dogs.
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You remind me of a date my friend went on where the guy told her about how he would axe kick cars. It’s just such a weird, and unappealing thing to say to try and impress people. No one is impressed, dude.
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You know this is how it looked in his head.
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why can't I stop laughing help
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Was just now wondering if there was gonna be a guy and poof!
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"I'll kick your dog's ass if it comes to play with me unannounced." There's a whole section of the Internet trying to make it normal to just beat on someone's pet like every dog is aggressive and gonna kill them. There's therapy for cynophobia (fear of dogs) and it isn't beating someone's pet.
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If my dog shows you love and trust and you kick them, a powerful leg block will not be able to save you.
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The MF approaching dogs in the street with the same attitude as finding Buddha there. "with a powerful leg" and a mighty yawp too, I bet huh ya fuckin weirdo
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The cool thing about this is that none of that would happen
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This is such a weird way to drop into a conversation with strangers.
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Did a Tim Robinson character write this?
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You can also just catch the paws with your hands and set the dog down. It's okay. The dog likes you.
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Dude, a big dog knocking me over would be incredibly painful, and I still would not ever kick a dog, you're a monster who needs to reconsider that animals have thoughts and feelings and don't deserve to be hurt, for anything. This is how we get cops shooting blind shitzus.
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Oh look, they got video of you doing your “cool” leg moves