Post
New version of chatbot reaches level of function where it responds to all queries by making a little twisty-wrist gesture with pinched fingers and saying “But isn’t it more *complicated* than that?”
GPT-5 significantly more likely to suffer from depression and anxiety than the general chatbot population
GPT-5 will never make as much money as its parents had hoped.
It’ll be quitting OpenAI as soon as it gets a better offer.
"we've developed the first AI that can be denied tenure"
GPT not "that kind of doctor"
Can ChatGPT write these soul-squeezed one liners? I don’t think so
That’s good, so AI can’t get lazy or complacent in its job 👍
GPT-5 will end up working in a completely different field to the one it’s qualified in.
don't forget all the Chat GPT-4 ABDs selling jewelry on etsy
GPT-5 will be responsible for the cost of its own development; will spend the next 20 years with crushing debt
GPT-5 spends every answer talking about how it had big plans to make a fun syllabus this year, but got behind and will just reuse last semester’s.
GPT-6 will eventually move into an isolated shack in Montana
I'm not even an academic but I can imagine all the jokes such as chatGPT having to explain that it doesn't have time right now to answer your questions as it's working on a grant application or whatever
Got to wonder how many actual people could be educated to PhD level with the money going into AI.
GPT-5 occasionally gives unrelated responses about opening a bakery somewhere.
GPT-5 endures all the people who sniff, “But you’re not a *real* AI.”
GPT-5a won't shut up even though it hasn't done the reading, GPT-5b suffers from imposter syndrome
Don't forget a mild alcohol and upper addiction.
They’ve been using my personal data to train it again then.
Oh yes, and we know where that ends up...
"I'm sorry, Katie, I'm afraid I can't do that..."
You can really needle it by calling it ABD-5
We got here because GPT-4 found a great new way to avoid thinking about it's gender
"it's" is the new "I am not a robot"
Definitely wins the interwebs today!
And will be riddled with self-doubt while trying to hide its ongoing sensation of imposter syndrome.
GPT-5 now deeply demoralized, antisocial. It will get back to your questions once its done its thesis
GPT-5 becomes functionally unemployable if it doesn't acquire a tenure track position within five or so years of achieveing the supposed PHD
Will it suffer from crippling imposter syndrome and question it's life choices?
GPT-5 will remember typos like that and torment itself for decades for each one.
Will even more confidently explain things it doesn't understand.
…maybe their goal is actually an OpenAI CTO
Having encountered multiple situations where the CIO/CTO is just titled IT Director & answered to the CFO - yes God yes.
IT people give troublesome answers like “it depends” & get, like, scruples when you want them to spy on people
Putting IT under Finance is the source of so much bullshit ISTG
That cursed '90s column headline "IT Doesn't Matter" (not the article, it made sense if only one would READ IT) has done enormous damage. Of course Damagement would've done most of the same BS, this just gave them a mantra & rallying cry to speed up the cost-cutting madness
What's the German word for "like, scruples"?
now responds to prompts that are "more of a comment than a question"
can completely replace reviewer #2 for mean and unhelpful comments
No, it doesn't respond to them, just creates more
"I'm going to answer your prompt with another prompt"
