Thufir Hawataburger

@lt-jerkface.bsky.social

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277

Following

302

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Some kind of varmint. He/him

Posts Replies Media

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Thufir Hawataburger

My head every time I get a DM that consists only of "Hey"

HEYYEYAAEYAAAEYAEYAAyoutu.be MWYAAAHplease note I do not own this video

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Thufir Hawataburger

Reply to

Katie Tightpussy

It truly is. They make some wonderful pieces. Templ covers "most gorgeous" of the European side. But their prices are...high. For those unaware, I have such sights to show you: www.templ.net/english/

TEMPL: Smithy - Newswww.templ.net Templ, Patrick Bárta, replics of cold historical arms from antiquity and middle age

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Thufir Hawataburger

Don't know when, but someday, someday my studio will bring back its mentorship program and I'll be giving young artists helpful advice like

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Thufir Hawataburger

The hardest part of saving the second half of the sandwich is knowing it’s just right over there.

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Thufir Hawataburger

Sexually Suggestive

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Thufir Hawataburger

Late night etymology: In early Rome there was a god named Fascinus who was a flying dildo with legs. Amulets with that image were called fascinium, and gradually fascinō came to mean “bewitch.” Over the years through Latin and Castilian fascinātus came to mean “fascinating” as we say it today.

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Thufir Hawataburger

Reply to

hongpong

i just checked the form it appears, very illegal indeed

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Thufir Hawataburger

Cartoon: JD Vance may have redefined the term 'couch gag' :)

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Thufir Hawataburger

This is my mona lisa

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Thufir Hawataburger

I have fucked the couch that was by the icebox and which you were probably sitting on earlier Forgive me I was horny so unloved and so cold

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Thufir Hawataburger

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Thufir Hawataburger

A special relationship reborn www.lolwot.com/wp-content/u...

David Cameron has his own Wikipedia page for "Piggate" and it's critical we don't let the British win this round.

Piggate - Wikipediaen.wikipedia.org

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Thufir Hawataburger

I slept on my neck wrong and I am 41 which means I am now dead. You are only able to read this because I’m haunting you

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Thufir Hawataburger

Federal minimum wage in: 2009: $7.25 2010: $7.25 2011: $7.25 2012: $7.25 2013: $7.25 2014: $7.25 2015: $7.25 2016: $7.25 2017: $7.25 2018: $7.25 2019: $7.25 2020: $7.25 2021: $7.25 2022: $7.25 2023: $7.25 2024: $7.25 Folks, it's time to raise the damn wage already.

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Thufir Hawataburger

I just found this old list of names I gave my horses in a Red Dead Redemption 2 playthrough in case anyone is trying to name a cat right now and needs inspiration.

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Thufir Hawataburger

Just met J.D. Vance’s high school girlfriend

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Thufir Hawataburger

I love my job. I just helped a bunch of 14 y/o on the spectrum build a robot w computer vision that scooches around the roomba style describing everything it sees with a little speaker. It’s hugely irritating but very useful for our one blind student And would be the Worst. Baby shower gift. Ever.

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Thufir Hawataburger

I went on Pinterest and it started recommending some Jubilee art for me to pin, and the first image was one of mine >_> Thanks, but I've seen this one before, Pinterest.

Sexually Suggestive

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Thufir Hawataburger

Sexually Suggestive

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Thufir Hawataburger

JD Vance did *not* have sex with a couch. This is the actual passage from his memoir

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Thufir Hawataburger

So funny to see these stories go the other direction. Instead of "Lawmakers Split on Whether Joe Performs Abortions Personally" we get "Vance Getting Questions About His I Didn't Fuck A Couch Shirt"

apnews.com/article/fact... THEY GOT THE AP TO WRITE ABOUT IT

Posts spread baseless rumors about GOP vice presidential pick JD Vance having sex with a couchapnews.com As the Ohio senator sets out on the campaign trail as the GOP’s vice presidential nominee, social media users are making false claims about the contents of “Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and C...

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Thufir Hawataburger

So wise

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that presumes we're all agreeing to play a game by the same rules. That is patently untrue. Nazis do not believe in freedom, or tolerance, or equality. So offering them those things, is a mug's game. And many people need to wise the fuck up.

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Thufir Hawataburger

Reply to

Chuck E. 🌊🦋

Also, wherever Herman Munster goes, people are gonna see him and shout Oh Hey! You were the judge in that funny movie with whatshername—damn she's hot—and um Danny DeVito? anyway you were great!

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Thufir Hawataburger

Also as we get older we’re not supposed to fit in with the kids! Leave them alone! It’s normal and fine for them to find things outside their own age cohort extremely cringe.

Some Millennials in my timeline are insecure because Gen Zs are telling them their ankle socks age them. I can't stress enough that you don't need to care about what a bunch of 20-somethings think about your clothes, mainly bc you don't have to care about what ANYONE thinks about your clothes.

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Thufir Hawataburger

From the moment I understood the weakness of my flesh, it disgusted me. I craved the strength and certainty of steel. I aspired to the purity of the Blessed Machine.

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Thufir Hawataburger

We are still confirming rumors that the feral cats have been spotted wearing hard hats near no man’s land.

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Thufir Hawataburger

Are crypto and bitcoin the same thing? Either way, we don't accept it.