Nick Douglas

@toomuchnick.com

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Terrible knife skills

https://linktr.ee/nickdouglas

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RIP Dr. Ruth. I just watched Scanners 😭

oh jesus christ i'm older than JD Vance

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Nick Douglas

Reply to

David_j_roth

I think Trump getting shot and being photographed with a defiant fist in the air, bloodied and unbowed, will actually lead to zero changed votes. He might be the only person in the universe that would be true of.

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Nick Douglas

Reply to

David_j_roth

I think the phenomenon I've really seen is how many regular people had the reaction of wishing a former president had had his brains blown out on live TV. Not freaks or radicals, someone's mom.

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Nick Douglas

You have been blessed by Cookie Puss hurtling through the cosmos

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Nick Douglas

Weirdo Dragon

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Nick Douglas

What's your excuse?

This is very very funny

James Patterson, Stephen King, Sarah Jessica Parker, Marlon James and other literary luminaries share their best books of the 21st century. See their picks. nyti.ms/3VNZtmA

Sundown Brandon

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The Piper at the Gates of Jawn

the best line in veep by far is "im scared we won't have a woman president again because we tried you, and you *fucking sucked*"

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Nick Douglas

Fall on your sword. Even if you miss you’ll touch grass

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Nick Douglas

if i am elected president i promise not to suddenly become old out of nowhere during election season

"Get offline, go outside," say the governor who killed the transit budget and the mayor who killed the parks budget

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Nick Douglas

it's really annoying that any time something else terrible happens in the US due to our government/whatever, there are people who are in a rush to be like "why are you surprised???" as though it's a contest to be the most jaded possible person about how terrible all of our lives are. don't do this

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Nick Douglas

Guys, hear me out. "The Originalist Case for Monarchy."

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Nick Douglas

The joke that gets lost is Ford Prefect named himself after the make/model of a car because he perceived that cars are the dominant life form on Earth.

The central joke in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a race of dipshits building a planet-sized computer to answer the question of "life, the universe, and everything" and then a million years later it says the answer is 42, and somehow that has taken on a William Gibson level of prescience

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Nick Douglas

Seriously academics get genuinely excited about this, it is often the best email they will get all month. I once had a professor send me not just the paper I requested but six more that he'd written that related to the topic he was so happy someone outside academia wanted to read his work

Every academic article has a corresponding author whose email address is listed on the first page. If an article is paywalled, just send a short, polite email requesting a PDF from the author. 95% of the time you’ll receive it within a day. People like knowing their work is being read!

Lololol www.cbc.ca/news/world/n...

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Nick Douglas

Her what

Just gave an encouraging nod on a Zoom call, before remembering it's a no-cams webinar. How much do I bill for this beyond-scope emotional labor

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Nick Douglas

Keeping libraries open is cool but have you ever flown a taxpayer-funded chopper to the Hamptons on a summer Friday?

You're Not Imagining Things: The NYPD Is Flying Way More Helicopters - Hell Gatehellgatenyc.com Keeping libraries open is cool but have you ever flown a taxpayer-funded chopper to the Hamptons on a summer Friday?

Why isn't Hyacinth Bucket proud to be descended from a chocolate-factory heir

I forgot why they rated my short story PG-13, and then I listened and remembered: The mountain calls all the animals "slimy little shits"

#PC843: The Mountain and the Vulture written by Nick Douglas and read by Wilson Fowlie. A #PodCastleOriginal! Rated PG-13 podcastle.org/2024/06/11/p...

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Nick Douglas

#PC843: The Mountain and the Vulture written by Nick Douglas and read by Wilson Fowlie. A #PodCastleOriginal! Rated PG-13 podcastle.org/2024/06/11/p...

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Nick Douglas

To this end, Lorde would ask of us what queer person is so enamored of their own oppression that they cannot see their own heelprint on their comrade's face? Judging from the discourse, I'd say many of you cling so tightly to the fact of your oppression that you can't see the harm you cause others.

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Nick Douglas

Time is a flat circle

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Nick Douglas

Imagine looking over from the couch to see your wife in her desk chair intensely snuggling her cat Billy. She has a headset on, and there's a Spotify playlist up on her monitor. You squint to see what it's called and --

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Nick Douglas

ant-man is refusing to get big and take a dump large enough to fertilize all the farms in the state. this is your “hero?”