Transphobes pretend to be methodology sticklers whenever studies support pro-trans outcomes but the research "supporting" transphobia is the jankiest shit imaginable.
link.springer.com/article/10.1...
Hahaha. I came out as trans at 20, and I may have been, you know, a 20 year old but I also definitely had greater motor function and complex decisional capacity than a 3 year old. When else would we both ever be included in the same study?
(I was also taking part in properly regulated studies re. trans people and binding at 20 and funnily enough, my fellow participants were not 3 year olds...)
(Just to clarify, this is absolutely not mocking trans 3 year olds who exist, it's just absurd to compare them to trans teens or adults because they are very different)
They are so different! I know a probably-trans 6 year old & it's wild how differently they think of gender. Family, school & friends are supportive so we get to see how utterly inadequate existing gender norms are for describing this child.
Talked w/ my 8 year old, about how some people aren’t comfortable in the body they are born into and we need to do everything we can to help them be who they want to be. He said he understood and then just said “dad, just so you know, I’m a boy in a boy’s body.”
Me: cool, man. Keep me updated.
Good luck with everything. As someone only tangentially involved in the medical care of people during transition (I’m a radiologist and do some of the pre- and post-transition imaging), I know how challenging the system can be.
My eldest’s bestie is a trans boy. They were also pals in nursery, back before the friend transitioned, went to separate junior schools, and then reunited at 11. The transition doesn’t make a difference: they’re just great mates either way.
I was just talking/fencing tonight with the person I genuinely used that line to when she turned back up to class after transitioning. Truly great line.
It takes years and years for them to get a solid grasp on the gender binary, which is overt in literally everything they hear and see. We don't teach anything as hard as we teach gender, and they're still out here reversing he and she at age 5 or 6 bc it's so arbitrary.
My daughter is 4.5 and still uses pronouns seemingly at random. He/she just isn't a meaningful distinction to her at all. I kinda love it tbh. Like, we are all just kinda guessing until told otherwise anyway, so her use might well be as accurate as mine.
My very girly but short-haired niece got asked by another kid at the playground "are you a boy or a girl?" and she replied "a boy. I mean a girl!" They don't seem to care as much as we did, though the clothing/accessories color-coding is stronger than it was when I was a kid in the '80s.
The music teacher at my kid's school is trans and the kids LOVE them. We met her last night and you could just tell how popular she is with the kids. It was also easy for my kid to grasp the concept of multiple pronouns. "My teacher isn't a boy or a girl. We can say she, they, or it. She is so fun!"
except it's usually the other way around for me where my kid tells me who in her class is going by a different gender now (but only because i misgendered them) and i have questions but she's already moved on to why she has to wear pants when it's 40 degrees out
My kid will mention someone and if I ask "wait is that a guy or a girl?" she'll be like "I don't know what they IDENTIFY as, Mom, I didn't talk to them." She thinks assuming gender on presentation is a little gauche.
My 14yo tells me that gender stuff is being used as bullying material at school, but these are kids who could literally find a bullying angle about *anything* up to and including the weather, so...
It’s the truth. My kids are 7 and 5. Their notion of gender flexes by the day and they’re v chill. Most kids think cats and dogs are distinct genders; why do we think they’ll share our hang-ups about this stuff?
It's always funny seeing adults project their own feelings so blatantly onto kids. See also: "This is a non-English name, and therefore my kindergartener who barely knows any names at all will find it as threatening and wrong as I do!"
I live in an extremely liberal area and to my kid pretty much gay people are adults and therefore extremely boring. There's very little difference because people of all gender expressions will not let her jump on the couch. It could just be like that, if it weren't for awful people.
My dad once asked me about a lesbian cousin & her wife, like if I thought it was weird when I was a kid. I said that wasn’t a thing that stood out, it was that they had a POOL at their HOUSE! And they had a dog! Who swam! In the pool!
Right??? lol I’ve only ever had dogs who HATED water. My current dog checks on me when I’m getting out of the shower, like “are you ok? That was a lot of water aka danger”
I mean possibly greater Cambridge, MA is not the common case here, but I’m pretty sure “they” is the most common pronoun among my teenager’s friends and at least a tenth of their social circle is trans
When, indeed, is lunch. Genderqueer is normal; hangry is a problem.
"Fascinating" is probably the right word because I am tempted to say "surprising" but if you've ever been around kids, this is the least surprising thing ever.
The kids are alright. My conservative in-laws were asking my middle schooler if anyone used "different pronouns" at school.
Him: Oh, yeah, x is they/ them and y in English is she this year.
Relations: That must be so confusing! How do you feel?
Him: *shrug*
They were so mad that he didn't care.
gen x story one of my best buds told me a mutual friend came out to them as trans and i was like oh. and my friend assumed i had misheard them or something by my lack of surprise and i was just like no its from knowing her for decades that im not surprised
My 5-year old reacted very negatively when our neighbor transitioned. I was all prepared for a long serious conversation about acceptance, but when I asked why it turned out he was worried he’d forget. When I reassured him that was ok, she’d understand and we’d help him remember, he was like, “ok.”
there’s an old post somewhere*:
“how do am i supposed to explain. Gay marriage to my kids??
you know how you have a mom and a dad?
kid: yes
well some kids have 2 dads or 2 moms
kid: ok. can I have a cookie?”
*I could not find it in my 30s google search
