We're all washed in the blood, aren't we, folks? We're all washed in the blood of the lamb. And when you kneel and you eat him at the end, it's very special. They say it's a mystery and they don't even know how it works.
Sorry to do this to you here but I want you to know an illiterate bluecheck has done a long thread using Bukowski quotes as grindset hustle culture inspo.
Thank you for attempting to "escape" your Tesla Cybertruck, I am your AI assistant BRI4N. "Escape" is not available at this time on your Cybertruck's current operating system. Would you like to upgrade your operating system at this time? Swirl initiation finger counterclockwise on screen for yes.
Daring to imagine a future in which Trump, forbidden to run again for insurrection-related reasons, tours the country forever talking about how much he would've won by, drawling through some luridly fash blood-and-soil rhetoric, and closing with celebrity birthdays. Daring to dream big.
The cost of getting rid of Robinson Canos contract and replacing him for the Mariners is now turning Edwin Diaz, Kendall Graveman, Paul Sewald, Marco Gonzalez and several less relevant players into Josh Rojas, Jackson Kowar, Seby Zavala and Carlos Vargas
Therapist: [entirely incorrect summary of the Incredible Hulk's origin story during an extensive metaphor]
My Brain: "don't you dare don't you fucking dare waste a single second of this expensive therapy session correcting her it doesn't matter it has never mattered"
honestly 2 eyes is a good amount. spiders can pull off 8. but flies got greedy. they were like: give me a million eyes. well, now you don't know how to get out of my house
It's funny that if Bluesky ever does take off, Jack Dorsey will go down as the undisputed king of microblogging platforms and he will have absolutely no idea what makes any of this good or why anyone uses this. It'd be like if the inventor of the dishwasher was a dalmatian.
Elon Musk (1971-2023) has died of an intestinal blockage. Doctors identified a small lump of partially digested plastic responsible for the mogul's demise. "This was recognizably a little green army man, eaten by the deceased," reads the report. "The little man on one knee. The one with a bazooka."
Eric Adams is amazing because when he won every media person was leaping over each to go “this is the normal sane leadership that the political left doesn’t understand normal sane Americans crave” and then every day since that Eric Adams has been like “Leprechauns are real and I’m going to cook one”
It honestly kind of sucks that they're making a whole movie about how one time a vampire got loose on a ship. Vampire-at-sea incidents are actually remarkably uncommon because of the strict practices and procedures that mariners carry out to prevent this very thing from happening
DeSantis fans are still trying to do the “he’s a fighter! Trump can’t stand toe to toe with a VETERAN” and it’s like there is no one Trump loves calling a pussy more than a veteran.
The thing about the relationship between Twitter and journalists is that the biggest impact was felt by the highest-profile and most pampered national writers, who were driven insane by people talking back to them for the first time but too addicted to ever put down the phone. I liked that a lot
