Philip Bump: Over spring break, we went to Boston and saw a recreated Revolutionary War battle and went to the science museum and then he saw a marionette show in the city and went to the Natural History museum and then his teacher asked him to summarize what he did.

Over spring break, we went to Boston and saw a recreated Revolutionary War battle and went to the science museum and then he saw a marionette show in the city and went to the Natural History museum and then his teacher asked him to summarize what he did.

INNOCENT

Oh look who is prioritizing Star Wars, big shock

Look at this beautiful sunset, I said, as my kid stared at YouTube.

At the Grand Canyon I heard a dad shout "put down that phone! We're going on a helicopter ride!"

King

TBF, Jedi is a lot cooler to draw than some boring old museum.

Ahem.

Luke Skywalker could fuck that thing up

Why would a Jedi Master fuck up a museum exhibit?

Nobody can roast you like your own kids

Concur, but my students can do a pretty good roast as well. This is prime season for it too. They’ve got 6 months of watching me to learn my weaknesses and they are all out of fucks to give from the winter.

That's why I never had any. My psyche couldn't handle the constant disses

Truth. The older they get, the more well done you become.

My kid went to the zoo with his class, saw all sorts of animals, played on animal statues, ate the same sack lunch as he eats roughly half the time. What was his favorite part of the day? That’s right, lunch

My favorite part of any field trip was my sack lunch. Ham & mayo on white bread, an orange or grape soda wrapped in a paper towel and foil to keep it cold, chips or Fritos, and a banana. Dreamy.

I mean, we used to have ice cream called Panda Pops at the DC zoo, so...

Last summer we went to India for 3 weeks and when they asked our kid what she did over break and she said "watched Bluey on the plane"

Not seeing the problem here

None of those other things involved Boba Fest, so . . .

Please, he prefers being called by his full name: Bobestival Festival

Oh, damn that Autosucko Correctfucko

Is that Kit Fisto's second cousin?

On his Vader's side.

Alright but that's a really good depiction from memory

I mean, when you think about it, the Continental Army were the original Ewoks

But they were a long time ago. Maybe like 1940 or so?

Yeah but the Continental Army only won at Yorktown because they closed the airport, right? 🤔 I'm sure I heard that somewhere. 🫣

🤣 Yes, and thank goodness he didn't mention the space port in Newark. 🤫 The media would have had a field day with him. What gets me is how quiet the media was regarding that remark. 🙄

Lord Cornwallis didn't stand a chance did he. 🫣 Yeah the media in so many countries need to hold politicians to a much higher standard.

We went to Hawaii and saw volcanoes, waterfalls, rainbows, beaches, historical buildings, monuments, whales, sea turtles, tropical fish, tropical birds, mongooses, and wild goats and boars. His school report was he got to eat a hamburger for breakfast (due to the time difference).

Impressive!

yeah, but that drawing is 🏆 so I see why that memory in particular was spotlighted

Yeah, he didn’t need to label anything, that illustration is perfectly clear

I showed this to my wife. Our five year old loves star wars. "I feel this in my bones" she said.

When my son was 6, we took him to Disneyland and a Dodgers game. The thing he was excited to tell his grandma? That they built a CVS next to the hotel.

That's a good CVS though

My kid around that age used to have to do weekly news every Monday and no matter what we did over the weekend she only ever drew her swimming lesson

Reminds me of when I had to write a journal in school and all I did was draw me sitting in front of a TV playing Legend of Zelda, complete with the sword sound effects.

kids are very good at shoehorning their special interests into any assignment

I mean, they wanted to know what I did all day and beyond school I couldn't be more honest!

Oh, I remember playing The Legend of Zelda with my son on my desktop computer. Somewhere around here I have a thumb drive I loaded all the midi files from the game. I listened to them a few years ago and several are actually nice pieces of music. (My son beat me in the game. 🤷‍♂️)

When I was about 4, we went on jam-packed road trip to Hot Springs, Arkansas. The only thing I remembered or cared about was seeing the Sesame Street Muppets on a color tv for the 1st time. (My hippie-dippy, young, broke parents only had a black & white tv back then.) One of my earliest memories.

I can empathise...with the kid.

That's a great Ewok I knew what it was without the label

He only had a few lines, he had to stick to the important stuff.

Definitely spring this on the kid in like fifteen years.

Meanwhile, I’m just terrified of my child.

Have they been watching "Pinky and The Brain?"

If only.

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